Why Most People Fail to Get Their Ex Back After A Breakup

 
quote about letting go
 
What is the first thing that runs through a person’s mind after a breakup?

How am I going to get my ex back?

That’s it.

This person then proceeds to become so obsessed with this problem, that their whole life literally, falls apart.

And, they just let it happen.

Why?

They blame it on the breakup.

Is this you?

If so, you need to read this article, and hopefully, wake up, and, smell the coffee.

 


 

My Life Sucks Since We Broke Up

 

Chances are your life was already starting to “suck”, ‘before’ you and your partner went your separate ways.

I am willing to bet this was one of the biggest reasons your relationship started failing, and, then, crashed and burned.

So what do you do now?

The more you try to ‘make things right’ the more they go wrong.

It is like you are starring in a bad episode of The Twilight Zone, huh?

The first thing you need to do is STOP trying to get your ex back, and focus on getting your life back on track again.

If your life sucks it is your responsibility to make your life better, not your ex.

You do not need your ex to be happy again, that is a lie.

 


 

How Do I Get Out Of The Breakup Twilight Zone?

 

If you think that the only way you will be happy again is by winning your ex back, you are in trouble.

Why?

You are obsessed, and your life will be a living hell until you realize this.

You must take action to break your obsession.

This is your obsession.

No one else is involved in this obsession…just you.

After you come to grips with the fact that you are the only one who can make your life better, (post breakup).

You are on your way out of the Twilight Zone, and, back to reality.

Reality is going to suck for a while as you get yourself back on track, but after that, you will steadily improve.

The number one reason people mope around (hide) in dumped-ville is because it is easier than facing the truth and fighting their way back.

But is it, really?

 


 

How Will Getting My Life Back Help Me Get My Ex Back?

 

Well, there is no guarantee you will ever get your ex back (50/50 chance).

But, I guarantee you can get your life back…if you want to.

Everything is a choice.

You choose what kind of attitude you live your life by.

No one else tells you how to feel about a situation, except for you.

Is the glass half empty, or is it really half full?

The short answer to the question; “how will getting my life back help me get my ex back?” is this.

No one is going to want a broken person.

Maybe someone will take you because they like to ‘fix things’ or just out of sympathy.

Getting “fixed”?

Getting sympathy?

That is not the kind of love you deserve, is it?

That is only pity.

Pity is a drug, do not become addicted, this will only make things worse.

If you want to attract ‘real love’ back into your life.

You have to show people that you’re worthy of being loved.

How do you do that?

Good question, grasshopper.

You do that by loving yourself (no, that’s not what I mean, you deviate).

Loving yourself enough to pick yourself up, and, put yourself back into the game of life.

If you do not see any self-worth in yourself…who else will?

Self love attracts love.

Self respect attracts respect.

Self pity attracts pity.

This is BIGGEST reason people fail to get their ex back, after a breakup.

They lose themselves, trying to get their ex back.

Why?

They are too busy trying to get their ex back after a breakup.

Do not let this happen to you.

Stand up and fight for your inner happiness.

Get yourself back, first.

Then, sit back, and, watch the magic start to happen.

 


 

Who Am I and Why Should You Listen to Me?

 

My name is S. Williams, and I have been helping people since 2008, to overcome breakup pain, and, get their lives back.

I even have an “About” section, that I recommend you read.

I realize the address, of my site, is: How to Get Your Ex Back Fast, but, I “really” teach people, how to get their lives back, not just their ex’s.

If you’re interested in working with me, (and our forum members) to get your life back, join my free newsletter, for access to the free breakup survival plan, and, start getting your life back, today.108b

The answers you need, to start your personal evolution, are waiting for you, don’t hesitate another minute…come, and get them.

Once, you get your life back, everything else will just start to fall into place…I promise.

If you have any comments or questions, please write them, in the comment box, below.

If this article was useful, or helpful, to you in any way, please show your appreciation, by sharing with others, using the buttons, below this article.

Until next time,

S. Williams

Copyright © 2008 and beyond – All Rights Reserved Worldwide – You DO NOT have permission to reuse this content in any way, shape, or form.

24 Comments

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  1. Let’s say me ex dumped me and found 2 guy friend she hangs out with everyday note these are her only friends really. She says they are just friends but it feels like she is into one of them. Anyway she came back to me after 40 days and then dumped me after we had sex. Now 3 weeks later she says she is sorry and she feels bad for how she treated me. I tell her I wanna wait 6 months and we can see what will happen. She agreed. Next day she sends me a photo of the promise ring I bought her and says last thing can i wear this. I saw yeah I still wear mine sometimes… Next day she says she wants to get back together right now but know we can’t. I just don’t reply.. what sh I do? I want her back but I want her back for ever

    1. Hi,

      You can’t let your ex control the situation, she will only continue to use you, for sex.

      If you want help surviving your breakup, go read the free breakup survival plan, and follow ALL the steps.

      Take Care,

      S.W.

  2. I have tried endless times …. I just need to reconcile with him becoz we were so in loved . Please don’t burst my bubble of hope and trying my best to fight for what matters to me.

    1. Hi,

      There is a HUGE difference between “trying” and “doing”.

      If you really want to be happy again, read the free plan, and follow ALL the steps, and then join our forum for free support while you evolve past your breakup.

      Don’t choose to live inside a bubble, burst the bubble and come back to the world.

      Take Care.

      S.W.

  3. Hi,
    Will it work still, still possible to reconcile when he have deleted picture of us? We haven’t been contacting for almost 4 months. His social media showing me that he’ve move on.
    I thought of writing a letter to him to reach out to him again. Will it help honestly. I have been so depress, how can someone just be so cold & harden when once we have so much sweet memories and moments. Really man can be that cold-blooded?
    I have been sourcing for solution , I really want him back coz I really really love him so much .

    1. Hi,

      Cherish the moments and memories, and move on – you can’t win back someone who doesn’t want you…it is just that simple.

      Once you have let yourself evolve past the break up, your next path to love will become clear, but as long as you refuse to move on, you will be stuck in relationship limbo…don’t do this to yourself, you deserve better.

      You don’t really want him back as much as you want to stop feeling rejected. The sooner you start NC (the right way) the sooner you will stop feeling this way, but it will take time.

      I help people get over a break up and get their lives back, not get their ex back, and I explain why in the “About” section on my Blog.

      Make a commitment to yourself to stay in no contact for at least 12 months, and do not focus on getting your ex back – let your ex go.

      Your main focus is to break your dependency on your old relationship (and your ex) for happiness, and reestablish your life as a Happy Healthy single person.

      This is much more important than getting your ex back, and in 12 months you will realize what I’m saying is true.

      Go read the free plan to get your ex back and follow ALL the steps to get over a broken heart, evolve past the breakup, and get your life back again.

      Thank you for writing.

      Take Care,

      S.W.

      IMPORTANT – If you found this information helpful or useful, please give me a “+1” rating by using the colored “+1 button” at the bottom of the above article. I’d really appreciate it.

  4. Hi!

    Was thinking of becoming a member of the forum and have a question of the NC message, and of what i’ve read, this is the fastest place to get an answer at.

    My ex cut contact with me 8 days ago. Blocked me on every place but one, but refuse to talk to me on there too. It’s a LDR relationship and he has been with a new girlfriend for 4 months now and I’ve never actually met him for real.
    He cut contact after I said he never loved me for real since he moved on and is with someone else.
    Do I still send the NC message even though we have no contact anymore and he told me to not try to contact him again?

    And also, i dont think the hardest part is to get him back, but to stop being hurt and angry with him for leaving me and being with someone else. To stop fearing that he’ll leave as soon as he find someone better, that i’m only his second choice since he didn’t find me worth staying for before. The feeling that I’d only get used or not being good enough in his eyes, that his current girl or other exes would be better than me in some way, which he has done now by pointing how that his gf isn’t jealous as i was, he can meet her daily and she makes him happy… and the fear that he’ll never put as much effort into the relationship as me, that as soon as things get tough, he just walks out on me.
    Yet i want him back badly, but i dont know how to let go of these bad feelings or forgive him for it, especially when constantly being reminded by others on another forum or by myself or by family, that he loves and cares for his current girlfriend so much more than he ever did for me since he’s taking her abroad but never had the money to come and see me.. 🙁
    Basically these thoughts and anger paralyzes me from even leaving the bed.. so how to get rid of them? I raelly can’t find any answers to it and i can’t let go of him since i love him. I fear never being his first choice, i just want him to fight to get me back for once 🙁

    1. Hi Sofia,

      Yes, if you want to become a member of our forum you MUST send the recommended NC message…why?

      Because only the people serious enough to send the NC message are ready to personally evolve past the break up and regain their life.

      Everyone else is just making believe they want to evolve, and there are plenty of other forums you can do that it in.

      Everyone feels that they have to get their ex back, that is normal, but once they evolve past the old failed relationship they start to see things more clearly, and realize the relationship wasn’t that great after all, and they deserved (wanted) more than their ex had to offer.

      You don’t really want him back as much as you want to stop feeling rejected. The sooner you start NC (the right way) the sooner you will stop feeling this way, but it will take time.

      I help people get over a break up and get their lives back, not get their ex back, and I explain why in the “About” section on my Blog.

      Make a commitment to yourself to stay in no contact for at least 12 months, and do not focus on getting your ex back – let your ex go.

      Your main focus is to break your dependency on your old relationship (and your ex) for happiness, and reestablish your life as a Happy Healthy single person.

      This is much more important than getting your ex back, and in 12 months you will realize what I’m saying is true.

      Go read the free plan to get your ex back and follow ALL the steps to get over a broken heart, evolve past the breakup, and get your life back again.

      Thank you for writing.

      Take Care,

      S.W.

      IMPORTANT – If you found this information helpful or useful, please give me a “+1” rating by using the colored “+1 button” at the bottom of the above article. I’d really appreciate it.

      1. so basically i have to create a new email address to send him the NC message to not contact me even though he wants absolutely nothing to do with me? O.o

        1. You could send the NC message as a singing telegram, but I think opening a free gmail account would be cheaper.

          The only way you don’t want to deliver the NC message is by voice, it must be written, other than that, anyway you can get the NC message to your ex will start your personal evolution, and your journey back to happiness.

          It works, go read the success stories on my Blog and in our forum.

          Take Care,

          S.W.

  5. Hello SW,

    I sent the NC message 2 1/2 years ago. Since then, I’ve grown a lot and evolved as man.

    My problem is this: I’ve dated other women. The problem is that they only distract me for a while and then I end up thinking about her. I think about her every day.

    How do I take my evolution a step further?

    There are days when I am completely over her and then there are days when I am comtemplating getting back with her and I feel an intense love for her.

    Is this true love or an unhealthy obssesion.

    In an utopian world, I would love to be free from thinking about her all the time but she is always there.

    Ive tried hypnosis, NLP, giving it time, etc etc etc.

    Her face is just always in minds eye. I no longer hate her or have disdain for her. I have evolved past that.

    What do I do? I was planning to reconnect in about a month when I get everything completely together in my life.

    The worst part is, its a see-saw. One week im over her and moving on and then the next week i want to marry her. is this “the notebook” type love or just bipolar dysfunctional weirdness?

    1. Hi,

      Did you send the recommended NC message as outlined in the free plan?

      It sounds like you have only “tried” to evolve, and that is not good enough, you have to do it.

      Trying doesn’t accomplish anything.

      Whether this is love, or just an obsession, time will tell, but in the mean time, you need to really focus on evolving past the break up.

      If you love her one minute, and hate her the next, it sounds like you are on the cusp of making your mind up, you just need to stick with NC, and keep working to cleanse your subconscious mind.

      You should start using subliminal messaging, and hypnosis on a daily basis, until it works…don’t just “try it”.

      Focus on getting your life together, and the rest will fall into place, you just have to have faith in yourself.

      You can do it.

      Thank you for writing.

      Take Care,

      S.W.

      1. Hey SW,

        Yes, I sent the NC word for word. NC w/her since. You are right, I’ve only tried. I had some bumps along the way but I will keep pushing.

        A lot of good things have been coming into my life. I have to really dig deep and push myself to that next level.

        I’m realzing, I have to really want it. The super version of me. I will focus and push myself further. I’m starting to see the more I evolve, the more her image and all emotions associated, get pushed back in the back of my mind. Its starting to go away completely. I just have to keep concentrating on myself and my evolution.

        Thank you SW, sending positive thoughts your way! I’ll keep you updated. I can do it! You mentioned i am on the cusp of making my mind up if I hate her one minute and love her the next….what am i on the cusp of?

        1. johnson said:

          what am i on the cusp of?

          You’re on the cusp of really starting your personal evolution.

          Take Care,

          S.W.

          1. So I sent the NC message 4 years ago. However, she still finds the time to message me every year on my birthday via emails, voicemails, etc

            Of course I never respond because I sent the NC message. It pisses me off every year and pisses me off more that I have some kind of emotion towards it.

            Its so annoying. I feel like she’s rubbing it in my face still or I don’t know.

            This time when she texted me I wanted to say leave me or alone or say who is this?

            Should I resend the NC message or just leave it alone? I clearly need more evolution if it still bothers me. I have no intention of going back to her.

            1. Hi,

              Resend the same exact NC message as outlined in the free plan (no changes) every time she disrespects your NC request.

              She obviously doesn’t care about your feelings, or she would leave you alone to heal, right?

              I would also recommend that you set up an email filter to send any message from her straight to the trash can, this will spare you a lot of discomfort in the future.

              Stay Strong and Positive!

              S.W.

              1. Hi SW,

                That was me on the forum. Though she may have made more effort, I never worried about what she was doing because I concentrated on my own evolution. She couldve felt that I didnt want anything to do with her since I sent the NC message and she respected it (except for birthdays). Either way, I cant worry about her, only think about how I feel. How can I fault her for not trying when I told her to not contact me? I want to reconnect and see where it goes.

                1. Though she may have made more effort, I never worried about what she was doing because I concentrated on my own evolution.

                  You never worried because she kept fucking up your personal evolution by breaking your NC request every year on your birthday – she kept you believing (and hoping) that she still wanted you back.

                  That’s what I call a bitch.

                  If you were ‘really’ concentrating on your personal evolution you wouldn’t be where you are right now, ready to make a big mistake.

                  Either way, I cant worry about her, only think about how I feel.

                  If I were you, I would WORRY A LOT about her, and her motives for keeping you on-the-hook – she probably wants to punish you for using NC on her.

                  Otherwise if she could ignore your NC request once-a-year on your birthday, she would have said more than happy birthday, if she had any intention of getting back together – she doesn’t.

                  Here is my good advice:

                  Stop trying to ‘twist’ the facts to your liking – you need to face the facts, and move on. Change your number and email so she can’t keep toying with you every year on your birthday.

                  Take Care,

                  S.W.

  6. also we are still married and have been together for 19 years seperated on may 1 2012.

    1. She isn’t acting like you’re still married.

      1. hi MR.S Bill again just want to ask you if you have known any couples who after 19 years of marriage who’s wife left for another man that the wife came back to the marriage.

        1. Hi Bill,

          I can’t say that I have.

          Every situation is different.

          Take Care,

          S.W.

  7. im ready to join the forum but having a problem with nc letter because not only do i have children 13 and 16 but also my wife still has stuff in our home that she say she wants and i know when i send the letter she will call right away to ask for it but not have anywhere at her boyfriends to put it and will just keep trying to contact me over it.don’t know how to handle this.

    1. Hi,

      All this is covered in the free plan, under the NC links.

      She wants her stuff, but there isn’t room at her boyfriend’s place?

      That’s why they rent storage bins to people.

      Let her and her BF rent some storage.

      She went and started her life over, why can’t you do the same?

      You can, if you take action.

      If you use the no contact rule correctly, you can evolve past this break up, and get your life back again.

      I help people get over a break up and get their lives back, not get their ex back, and I explain why in the “About” section on my Blog.

      Go read the free plan to get your ex back and follow ALL the steps to get over a broken heart, evolve past the breakup, and get your life back again.

      Thank you for writing.

      Take Care,

      S.W.

      IMPORTANT – If you found this information helpful or useful, please give me a “+1” rating by using the colored “+1 button” at the top or bottom of the above article. I’d really appreciate it.

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