What is Wrong With My Ex Boyfriend – Why Does He Act This Way?
Do you ever wonder what is wrong with your ex boyfriend? Does he do things that have you puzzled? What the hell is going on with him anyways? Maybe I can help. Do you really want…him, back? I am going to try to help you understand; “what is wrong with my ex boyfriend?”
Get My Ex Boyfriend Back
How come he still keep things of mine when he says he does not love me? I think this is pretty self explanatory, but if you would like to hear someone say it…”he still thinks about you, and possible more.” I will. The worst thing to do here would be to over react. What? women over reacting…never happens. Take this for what it is a big clue that he is not over you. “Why does my ex boyfriend do that?” Because he has feelings he isn’t ready to show, yet.
Getting Ex Back
How come he is with another woman, but he is always smiling at me? Maybe he’s drunk?…just kidding. This one would seem pretty obvious too. The sight of you brings out emotions he can not hide, a smile is so spontaneous, they are hard to stop. Another good sign but once again, do not over think, or over react. “Why does my ex boyfriend do that?” Because you are still in his heart, and on his mind, use these signs as a tool. They tell you, you have a good chance of getting your ex back, but you need to know what you’re doing…or you could fail.
Getting Your Ex Boyfriend Back
Why does he act nice one day, and rude the next? This is a tough one, but I would suggest he is confused, and it is annoying him. Now, if he becomes abusive, and real mean, you might want to step back for a while. Do not over think this and think that he hates you. Everyone has had a time when they were upset, and said things they really didn’t mean…right? He could be going through a rough time, do not take it personally. “Why does my ex boyfriend do that?” He is human, and confused, and so are you. One of you should find a plan, and start working on getting back together again.
Get Back My Ex Boyfriend
If your ex boyfriend is showing you signs that he is still interested in you. You need to ask yourself “do I want him back?” If you do want your ex boyfriend back it is time to get serious, and get informed. If you have any comments or questions for me, please write them in the comment box below, and I will answer them ASAP! What can I do to help you get your ex back? What are you willing to do to “win my ex boyfriend back?”
Until next time,
S. Williams
~I know that “love hurts” but with my help you will get strong enough to kick love’s ass~
http://www.howtogetyourexbackfast.com
Copyright © 2008 and beyond – All Rights Reserved Worldwide – You are free to reprint this article, as long as you do not change anything in the article – it must be in it’s original form…including my name, website address, and this statement.
Why does my ex-boyfriend insist that we remain friends. He’s been contacting me more lately…in the past 2 weeks. He told me about a month ago that he doesn’t feel anything for me but yet when he sees me, there’s something in his eyes that tell me otherwise. Not only in his eyes but the way he acts around me. What is all this about because it sure does confuse me.
Hi Mari,
Usually when an ex boyfriend or any kind of ex, insists on remaining your friend, and in contact with you, it is because they are not sure if they are over you yet, and don’t want you to move on.
This really sucks for the person they left because it puts them in “relationship limbo.”
My advice is to find out what “he wants’ by using no contact.
If you are not familiar with the no contact rule, read about it on my Blog, and get a general idea how it works, then get a good plan, and follow it.
Does My Ex Still Love Me?
No contact will make him come to a decision about his feelings for you, and he will either become more than a friend, or leave you alone, and let you move on.
This will set you free from relationship limbo, but…
Don’t let the fear of losing him stop you from finding out the truth.
It is better to know the truth, then it is to live in confusion…Right?
I hope this helped.
Take Care,
S. Williams
Well I withdrew from him. I no longer contacted him. If he happened to call, I would make sure to keep it a short call. I asked how he was and so and so and then would tell him that I had to cut the call short because I had to go (even if I didn’t.) I didn’t always answer. This went on for about a month and I was about to tell him that I wanted no contact at all. Then two weeks ago the calls and contact began. Whether he did it by phone, text messages or online, whichever means he used but he initiated the contact. The phone calls eventually became longer. He invited me to his house last week and I went over. We had a good time, laughed and joked around. Yet he always made sure to touch my hand or my face and would compliment me. At one point I laid down for a bit and he went over and just hugged me like he doesn’t want to let go. Still it confuses me, I guess because we haven’t discussed anything about us. I don’t think I should bring it up or when to bring it up if at all.
Hi Mari,
It sounds like you really need a good plan to follow.
Your confused because you have no idea what to do, and I can not explain it to you here, because there is just so much involved.
Why don’t you read, and do some research on using the no contact rule correctly.
I would suggest you learn how to correctly use no contact, so you will get the results you want a lot faster…OK?
Take Care,
S. Williams
my ex boyfriend is showing two of these with me for example one day hes nice and talkative and the next he stays locked up in his room and i wont get so much as a hello when i get home. Also sometimes he will say i look good or make comments about how im “doing things to tease him” or he will offer to drive me places…we even “spent” a night together but after he said this does not change anything between us…what does this mean?
Hi Amanda,
It sounds like he is having problems other than with your relationship.
Now’s the time to back off and stop worrying about the relationship, and give him some space.
When you just add more to a persons confusion you’re not helping your situation very much…understand?
He sounds closed off at the moment, and you aren’t going to ‘pry” him open…OK?
When he’s ready, he will open up to you, and then you will have your chance to learn more about what’s going on in his head.
A person can flirt without being in love, and on the other hand people lie about their true feelings too.
Hence, when he told you that your night together didn’t change anything.
People believe if they say it, it’s true…not really in some cases.
Be patient, and give him time…OK?
Look around my Blog, and read all the comments that are here, maybe you will see something that you can relate to.
Send them a comment, maybe the both of you can help each other?
Just for the record…everyone is welcome to communicate with each other, as long as it says civil.
I will not permit any bullying, or bashing of other people…OK?
Any rude, hurtful comments will be deleted.
This Blog is a place for finding answers, and for healing.
Use it to it’s fullest extent.
I am thinking of adding a forum in the future…what do you think?
I hope this helped.
Take Care,
S. Williams
this is for anyone who might be able to relate or has had something similar happen…
i did i really bad thing and i wish now i never did it because i did not like what i found…i snopped through my ex boyfriends room (we live together at the moment} and found two condoms witch made me think right away hes sleeping with someone else…i never took into consideration that his brother is staying with us and had his girlfriend over the other night, well you know what happend from there. Im still not sure who’s they are…so i was just hoping someone could give me some insight on this, should i talk to him? if so what should i say.
Hi Amanda,
A relationship is built on trust, and you obviously don’t trust your ex, or respect his privacy.
I have one question for you:
How would you feel if your ex went through your things, and then jumped to a conclusion?
I would back off for now, and give him some time, you can apologize later.
Right now he is upset, and you will only make things worst.
My best advice…learn from what just happened, and never do it again.
You can’t change the past, but you can learn from it…understand.
You need to get your emotions under control before you totally blow any chance of getting him back.
Take Care,
S. Williams
i broke up with my boyfriend from a rumor my friend told me. so i regretted doing that when i found out it wasnt’ true. but He wasn’t sure about getting back with me because he didn’t like the fact that i chose to believe my friend instead of him. So i went out with someone else, but we broke up 5 or 6 months later. then i started talking to my old ex again and asked him if there is any potential for us to be together ever again and he said that we are really good friends but that is all. So i stopped talking to him and got another boyfriend, but that wasn’t going well either so i went to my old ex boyfriend for advice, and ever since i contacted him he has been asking me to hang out. So i broke up with the other boyfriend because obviously i still had feeling for my old ex. This one time he kissed me and hold my hand. and also asked me to hang out with him other times as well with his friends. So im really confused so i did the ignoring thing, and he texted me a week later saying “Hey my love lets go bowling” i didnt end up going cause it was late. So yes i dont know whats going on . He said we were just friends then a month later were hanging out again. Im usually the one texting him, but now he’s the one talking to me. My guy friend thinks he’s playing with me.Can you help me figure out whats going on with my old ex please?
@ Lizzie:
Hi Lizzie,
Go to my section called Start Here First FAQs and read FAQ #1 and join our forum as directed in the FAQs…OK?
We will help you once you post your story there per the instructions in the FAQs.
See you on the inside!
hi..my bf dumped 2 weeks ago.he said he just grew tired of me.but he immediately wanted us to be friends an hour after the break up and i agreed.he came by my house a couple of times and we talk online.mostly he initiates the conversations.the last time we saw each other was 4 days ago where he surprised me by coming to my house.then he started to kiss me like the way we used to before.after 2 days,i asked him why he came and kissed me.he said because he missed me.but after that,i never heard from him again.it’s like he’s ignoring me.we’ve been together for almost 5 years and i miss him terribly.i did not initiate any contact either after he’s been ignoring me.what should i do to get him back?
pls help me 
Hi,
Go to my FAQs and follow the directions for joining our forum.
FAQ Pages
Scott. After two weeks of trying to show my ex how much i love her she still wont comment on anything ive said. She hasnt tried to remain friends. All she has told me is maybe later we can be together and that she will always love me. Hmmmmmm.
Finally after numerous attemps to win her back I told her ive done all I can do and all I can do now is wait and hope she will write me one day. I find it very difficult to use NC after such a remark. How can I ignore her after i welcomed her reply.
I would appreciate it if you could comment on both paragraphs please.
Thank you
Can someone ever recover from acting like a needy clings wuss and gain the respect again? Id like to go back and redeem myself but i feel ive said enough already.
Oops!!! feel free to move this. Wrong thread.
Chuck wrote:
You need to go to my FAQ’s section and follow the directions for joining our forum.
I don’t answer relationship questions on my Blog anymore…that’s what the new forum is for.
my ex and I are pregnant. He left because I was “nagging” him? I It’s been about two months and we have had little contact in between. He texts me a week ago asking “How r u ?” I did not reply for about three days because I have been working on my depression issues and trying to better myself, not to mention trying the best I can to take care of my 3 year old daughter. Anyway, when I texted him back, finally, he did not respond. Then I texted him 2 days later about my daughters old crib, to see if his family and him wanted it. He got back to me and said “not sure, probably”. I did not text back, and I haven’t heard from him since. We have to try to remain friends cause we are having twins in Oct, but why the distance? After 2 months? I mean I know I messed up in the beginning, after our break up and mad major mistakes, but we have talked since then and I apologized. I am now wondering his distance and what it means? Is he trying to tell me there is no way in hell we are getting back together as a couple, or is he second guessing his move that called it quits? Please help and if you need more info, just let me know. I am sure I left some stuff out, but hopefully you get the gist of it. Thanks.
dani wrote:
The best way to answer that question would be to join our forum and follow out step by step plan.
If you want my help to get your ex back follow this link:
http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/topic/read-this-first
Make sure you read the rules and guidelines before you join, I strictly enforce them.
My ex got in contact with me after 5 months.he wanted to be friends. he said he was sorry for everything he did. He e-mailed me and messaged me for a few days. Then i asked him to meet me for coffee, he said that he would but he was too busy at that time. I never hurd from him after. I phoned, he never phoned back. sent e-mails and nerver e-mailed back and wont talk to me online. After a week or so i stoped for a week then tryed to talk to him again but no hes too busy. So why would he get in contact with me if didnt want to talk to me. he wont meet with me. I dont think its such a big deal to meet. I have deleted and blocked him from everything. part of me wants him back but part dont. But why would he contact me and ask to be friends if he really dont want to and what should I do about it.
summer wrote:
Hi Summer,
I am going out on a limb here, but I would say he contacted you because he stills has feelings.
Why did he blow you off after that?
Because he is an idiot.
summer wrote:
First off you don’t want to be “friends” that can become a very bad place to be with your ex, especially when it leads to friends with benefits.
The best way to deal with this situation is to leave him alone, and when he contacts you again, hit him with the recommended NC message from the free plan, OK?
The link for the free plan is at the top of my Blog.
Take Care,
S.W.
when my ex bf did call me again after 5 months and wanted to be friends. He was also acting or showing me that he was happy without me. what does that mean?
I did ask him after he wanted to try again and he said that it wasnt a good time right now. He never gave me an answer for why not? The he stoped talking to me. What could all of that be about? He just started dating another girl. That is the third one since we broke up in 5 months. And of course i have went oh many dates and havent found anyone. maybe i should just give up
summer wrote:
Hi Summer,
Did you follow the free plan on my Blog, or did you just stop talking with your ex, and then he called you 5 months later?
If you didn’t follow a good for using no contact, that is why your results sucked.
If you want to try the free plan, the link is on the upper right-hand side of my Blog.
Take Care,
S.W.
i did use the plan
i went no contact. i never seen him for a full month, then after that it was another full month before he contacted me. i told him i was here for him. i guess it no contact again.
summer wrote:
You used the free plan for 5 months?
summer wrote:
You will have to refresh my memory.
Where in the free plan on my Blog does it say to tell your ex when they call after 5 months, that you are there for them.
I remember a different strategy where you set up a short meeting, and take things slowly.
Yeah, I would say to start over again, and re-send the recommended NC message word for word, and this time follow the plan, don’t make it up as you go along and expect it to work, OK?
Take Care,
S.W.
i never said that was in the plan (i told him i was here for him) but that was what I did. I asked him to meet me but he kept saying he was too busy to meet. He havent spoke to me since. So just because i said one thing different. I ruined it. is that correct. I dont understand why you are not answering my question inn the first place?
summer wrote:
After these few exchanges I would bet that you fucked up more than just that “one thing”…it’s just a hunch.
summer wrote:
Which question…the one about if you should give up?
Yeah, you might as well, because if you can’t follow a free plan…I can’t help you.
Good Luck!
no i havent, your plan dont always work. you have to amit that and not blame others. just cause i said one thing that i wasnt supost to say i fucked the whole thing. whatever. your fucked
summer wrote:
Let me break it down a little for you, OK?
I can tell your a bit slow.
If you give an idiot a pencil, and they stick in their eye, it doesn’t mean the pencil didn’t work.
It just means the stupid cunt (you) didn’t use it correctly.
If you had any idea how the plan worked you would know it’s not about getting your ex back…but that would assume you know how to read.
I love it when you lazy fucking bitches come on my Blog, and tell me you used the free plan when you didn’t…you lie to get me to answer your dumb questions about why your ex did this or that.
Well, if you had any common sense you would realize that if you correctly followed the plan, you could answer your own fucking question.
This plan is about revealing their “true feelings” it doesn’t make them fall in love with you, or hypnotize them into coming back.
If he does/doesn’t love you…that is what you would find out if you had enough brains to follow a “free” fucking plan.
summer wrote:
No, your ex boyfriend is if he ever comes back to you…and not in the good way, either.
Take Care,
S.W.
Hey Scott.
Just wanted to say. I finally got my act together and have stopped obbsessing. I had to start nc over (my own fault), however im now well into it 20 days and this time im going to kick ass! Come to realize the truth will come and in the mean time im evolving well.
Thanks
Sally wrote:
Great Job Sally! (Thumbs High)
Stay Strong!
S.W.
me and my bf broke up a year more ago. i have been calling him a lot. last 2 months we almost spent the whole time together cause we live in different countries and i went to visit him. i found out he had been liking another girl when i was there.. and before that girl he liked some other girls.. like few weeks before i left.. he says he doesnt want any other girls anymoreand that he wouldnt look for any girls.. he says he likes me and how beautiful i am and he loves me he would always comes up to me and hug before he left to work and when he was back from work.. he would come to me straight. but now im back to my hometown which is milessss away from him. I tried calling him again he would talk a lot when he was alone but when theres people around him he would wanna hang up as soon as he picks up the call. Lately, he even asked me to stop when i told him i missed him. Also, he mentioned on the phone that i should stop liking me. I dont understand the whole thing? what should i do now if i want him back eventually? should i stop calling him and texting him at all? its a long distance thing. hope you can give me some hints thanks a lot/
Emma wrote:
Hi Emma,
He is really sending you mixed signals.
The best way to find out his true feelings for you is to use the free plan on my Blog (link at the top).
Read it all the way through, and then start over and follow every step, OK?
Take Care,
S.W.
thats kinda weird to send a no contact msg now cause we have been talking a lot since the break up and his friends became my friends that i would spend time talking to them a lot. would it be weird i dont talk to him but i talk to his friends a lot? thanks x
Emma wrote:
But are you back together?
I am not here to convince anyone what they should do, I just give out advice that I have seen work, time and time again.
If you want to get over the old failed relationship, and make room for a new one, you need to follow all the steps in the free plan.
But, if it feels weird, keep things the way they are now.
Good luck!
Take Care,
S.W.
thanks there’s one thing i am wwondering if guys can really hold back not to talk to the their exs even if they still like them? i didnt send any no contact msg but we haven’t talked for a week. x
Emma wrote:
Sure they can, and so can girls.
Emma wrote:
What are you waiting for, for him to get married to another woman? :banghead:
Take ACTION now!
Go read the free plan on my Blog, the link is at the top of my Blog.
Get moving and start kicking loves ass today. :kickbutt:
Take Care,
S.W.
Hello..
My long time crush finally asked me out on a saturday night. We talked all night friday night, all day sunday, and monday we went to school. Monday was perfect. On tuesday, he came into school and broke up with me. He says he liked it better when we were friends, but he also says that we never saw eachother, and that it didnt feel right. Now it has been a while and he is acting weird. Sometimes he talks to me, but sometimes he talks to his ex. He says he hates his ex and that she is a b*tch. But he also teases me by saying im on the chubby side, and that im mean. Sometimes i swear he likes me, but then sometimes he doesnt. Please help me :willy_nilly:
Amanda wrote:
Hi,
Ignore him, and find someone who will treat you right.
If you don’t respect yourself, no one will.
Take Care,
S.W.
No, I mean he says it in a joking way..he always jokes around with me and stuff
omg… i just tried not talking to him and eventually the feeling for him has gone. Its been around 2-3 weeks i called him. and now he messaged me that he saw something else that he thought of me and he misses me. did that mean he like me or just a friendly message to see how i am. im so confused. guys are confusing. and theres another guy i met he told peopel he has a crush on me.he bought me gifts. he talks to me all time when i get on IM. He flirts a lot with me and still do but he talks about some girl screamed when she saw his muscle and that telling me that girl wanna hang out with him but he says that would be better the other day.. why would he tell me? what does that mean when a guy do that? thanks
xx
for the first guy i meant his texted me… he never did that for oversea!! * if u remember my story, i wrote here to you early…2 weeks ago. thanks =P
Emma wrote:
That is hard to say….but, 2-3 weeks i not enough time for NC to work.
Go read, and follow the free plan on my Blog, the link is on the right-hand side bar.
If you feel you’re ready, follow the section on reconnection, if he pulls away again, start over from the beginning, and use NC correctly this time.
As far as the other guy, he sounds like he just likes to get attention, you can try dating him, if you have to go back into NC with your ex…sound good?
Take Care,
S.W.
me and my ex have been friends before we dated. But he always liked me.. after 4 months of being friends i started dating him.. it lasted for 2 months cuz he was barely texting me or calling me.. anyways, he said he still wanted to remain friends.. but i avoided that response then he texts me back 3 days later asking if i was mad and i said no. hes been normally how he always was but ever since he heard some guy tried kissing me hes been a lil mean to me, calling me names like sloppy drunk but he says hes just kidding.. anyways he keeps telling me that he has a new girl but yet every pic i have of a gurl on my facebook he compliments them saying theyre sexy. and recently i was joking around with him and saying his picture looked bad and he started saying i have no friends, i annoy everyone.. so i deleted him, then he immediatey adds me again and writes me a message saying “why u delete me” and i said cuz your being a jerk .. and he said he was saying those things cuz i said i was talking “sh*t” first and hes just joking around
why is he acting like this? its annoying me
oh and he is the type that never expresses his true feelings to anyone.. he even told me that himself
Anna wrote:
To annoy you, and it is working.
I think he is still interested in you, but too chicken to say so.
Ignore him for a while and see what he does…block him out.
Anna wrote:
OK, if that is the case..
How do you know he just shared his true feelings, about his true feelings?
He is just once again breaking your balls, and trying to get your attention.
Why don’t you start dating another guy and watch his “true feelings” come out.
Take Care,
S.W.
Me and my ex boyfriend broke up about a month ago and he has called me and we have talked since. we hung out a few times and acted like there was no change. he says that he still has feelings for me but is going through a lot right now and needs some time and space. he acts like he still likes me but i dont know what to think. he told me when we broke up to keep my options open. but i dont know if he wants to be with me or not. i dont know if i should move on or see what could happen with him. what do you think ?
ally wrote:
Hi,
I think you should read the free plan, and then follow ALL the steps.
During your personal evolution you will find the answers to your questions, it will take time.
Take Care,
S.W.
my ex broke up with me and i did beg him back and kept callin and i know now i shouldnt have done that but how do i fix it and make him think i am fine,he talks to me some but not alot,he called me a few nites ago and i was talkin 2 a guy friend and he told me 2 hang up with him and talk 2 him and he was playin songs that he had played 2 me be4,we really didnt talk bout much but anyways last nite i called him and told him i needed 2 talk 2 him be4 i go out with my aunt and some friends and he said yea ur gonna b with guys and he said well just stay and talk 2 me and not go,i called him at 9:30 and was leaving at 10:30 so i told him i wouldnt go and just talk to him and i told him i loved him and want to be with him and he said he loves me and wants to be with me more than anything but he dont think we can make it work,he waited till 10:30 to tell me this when he knew i wasnt goin now,i cried and he said he had to go so i begged him and kept callin him and he said i was crazy,i cant understand him,y is he doin this to me and what does he want and how do i fix my mistake of begging him and acting like im fine,idk y he broke up with me but plz help me fix this bc ive read if u beg and call then it pushes them away and i dont want that so someone plz help me fix my mistake!!!!
kayla wrote:
Hi,
You’re right!
If you beg and plead you will rive your ex away.
Instead use the free plan, and the no contact rule to attract your ex back to you.
Go read the free plan, and it will explain everything you need to do.
Take Care,
S.W.
hi, me and my ex bf broke up almost 2 years from now, (relationship of 1 year and a half)we still talk, see each other and hang out together llike once a week or stuff. he keeps saying that he doesnt want us to get bakc toghter, but when he sees me interested in another guy he acts very jealous, in fact hes jeaolus all the time and practically it is the same as when we were together in all aspects, its been alot of stuff that we have been through since were not oficial, but if he doesnt want me why hes still around? if we fight and stuff, hes still here always in bads and good times , together, its very confusing, i would only like him to decide whether to be or not to be with me, because i dont like to be tinkin that i could be losing my time with someone that doesnt love me back.
Erika wrote:
Hi,
He is having his cake and eating it too, and you are left hungry.
It sounds like you are both stuck in relationship limbo.
Someone needs to take the initiative to break out of limbo so you can either get back together, or move on.
Go read the free plan, and follow ALL the steps.
Send the recommended NC message (even though it has been 2 years)…why?
Because he stills acts like you are in a “offical” relationship even though you are not.
Actions always speak louder than words.
NC will work in your case, so get started today, why waste any more time wondering about how he feels, find out for sure.
Take Care,
S.W.
I’ve read your plan with interest, but have a few questions, as this is an unusual “break up”; I’ll try to be brief, but it is somewhat complex –
My ex-husband and I were together for 15+ years, then broke up Jan of ’07. Two years later, I divorced him. Now, a year later, he’s a changed man (he WAS addicted to crack and abusive, but has been clean for over 18 months now) and I want him back. BUT! About a year ago, he moved out-of-state, finally healed from our break-up, and moved on. He fell in love, got the woman pregnant, and was engaged. She lost the baby and they broke up in Jan of this year. He came to town late April and I realized I wanted him back. By then, the last ex- was back in the picture, so while he agreed to “date” me, he wouldn’t “commit”. Because of mistakes I made (“head games” and “drama”, as he called it), he called it off about three weeks ago and since his business here is over, he’s moving back out-of-state, where SHE is…So now, I want to know HOW EXACTLY would I work this plan? The relationship he’s in is clearly not a rebound and I’m really afraid they’ll get pregnant/married while I’m working it. Not to mention that since he got over me enough to be engaged and pregnant [before], how can I be sure he will miss me, when he’s already gotten over me and started living his own life? Also, we can’t be completely “no contact” as we speak several times a week about our three offspring. While we have been keeping it to parenting issues only, just hearing his voice makes me a wreck and unable to move forward; how am I supposed to evolve when I can’t control my emotions? … As I said, this’ quite the unusual situation and I don’t even know that a reconciliation is possible at this point.
Hello!
It’s been about a month since I started NC from my ex-boyfriend. For the past week during our hours together at work, I’ve been noticing him becoming more comfortable in my presence. When I said goodbye one day, he said goodbye when no one else did, and he’s made a comment or two off of something I’ve said during an open conversation with our coworkers. He’s also making jokes again in my presence, even if they aren’t directed towards me. Although we don’t go out of our way to make eye-contact with each other, occasionally I see him sneaking a glance or two in my direction and he’s not particularly afraid to be where I am (though that might be because I usually have fellow co-workers/friends in my presence.) If anything, I’m the one who’s trying not to pay attention to him with all my might in order to continue NC!
Overall we seem pretty comfortable in each other’s general presence this week, though we haven’t initiated any one-on-one casual talk yet. Should I finally break the ice and ask if he would like to meet up after work for a short 20 minute catch-up catch? I’ve reviewed MOMU quite a bit and am ready for a talk with him; the only thing I’m worried about is initiating the talk too soon.
Hi,
So me and my ex have been broken up for about two months from a two and a half year relationship. After more than a month without contact i did the mistake of texting him and initiating contact and continued this for three weeks straight. I did all the mistakes asking him to hang out, telling him i loved him and missed him, etc. He would respond each time but then ignore me. Just three days ago i sent my ex a NC message that i had gotten from another site and added some extra things. this is what i wrote:
“Hey. Ive been meaning to tell you this for a while but havent got the chance to. For one i just wanted to apologize for all the mean things i have said to you when we broke up and for not giving you your space when you needed it. For the past two months i have been thinking alot about what went wrong between us and regret stressing you out, pressuring you about marriage,etc. I agree that we should be broken up and it is probably the best thing for both of us right now. I will give you time alone. Maybe at some point we can be friends.”
Ugh…to only kill it after it and write another message like saying how my feelings for him have never changed and i have never stopped loving him and always will. And how the relationship was the best two and a half years of my life etc. that i will cherish all the memories and how ill always be here for him….
BIG MISTAKE!!
So ya this was like three days ago. my question is….Should i resend the suggested NC message on this site or jsut leave it with what i wrote and continue with NC?? Your advice is greatly appreciated!
Cheyenne wrote:
Hi,
That would be a good question for a professional counselor.
Cheyenne wrote:
If you have been reading the free plan you will have learned that it is NOT about getting your ex back, it is about getting your life back.
If you fall apart at the sound of someones voice you need to get your life back.
I am NOT a professional counselor, I offer the free plan to people so they can help themselves.
If you feel you can use the free plan to help yourself, go ahead and read it, and then follow ALL the steps.
If you do not have faith in the plan, please don’t waste your time, and seek better advice.
Take Care,
S.W.
Nelly wrote:
Hi,
The 30 day NC rule is just a bench mark, not every situation can be reconciled in 30 days.
Follow your “gut” instinct, and do not try to reconnect too soon, it will only set you back to the beginning again.
You can not rush through NC, no matter how anxious you are to get your ex back.
The whole idea of the free plan is to get your life back, not your ex.
Once you reach a point where you are not worried about getting your ex back, you will ready.
Take Care,
S.W.
express wrote:
Hi,
If you broke NC too soon, then you need to send the recommended NC message (word for word) as outlined in the free plan.
Take Care,
S.W.
thanks…ya i definitely did break NC to soon the first time but i am already into three days of NC again since the NC message I wrote. Does it make sense to write the recommended NC message and start over again?
express wrote:
It does to me, why?
Because the message you used wasn’t written correctly.
A better question would be why did you send that fucked up version of the recommended NC message, and then come ask me if you did the right thing?
It’s a little late now.
I can’t turn back time, but I can tell you that your message won’t work as well as the recommended NC message.
Next time ask before you do something, my advice works a lot better under those conditions.
Take Care,
S.W.
Ok i am going to send it right now as a matter of fact. Thanks for the advice i wish i wouldve came on this site sooner and especially before sending that message!!! I guess i panicked. I really hope this works, already been down this road and my situation is tough…so many details.
Hi Scott, my ex split up with me in April this year. I have seen him three times since the break up (long distance). We are ‘trying’ to stay friends but suddenly last week he calls me out of the blue at work which he hasn’t done since just after the break up. He also called me twice on the friday. He keeps on confusing me, in one conversation when he was drunk he asked me if i still loved him, i said i didn’t know and asked him and he said no, then i said if my answer had of been different what would he have said and i think he said i don’t know. I do still love him. He said drunk that he wanted me to move in with him and marry him but before that said if this was a proper relationship you could come round. He said that the reason he is being nice to me is because I’ve stopped asking to see him. I asked him today did he still have feelings for me and he said no so why all the mixed signals. The last time i saw him i stupidly told him i had been with someone else and i have denied it because he has trust issues and I don’t want him to think that I am like his ex’s because I’m not and it was a mistake. He said he had a dream of me and i had a new boyfriend and the boyfriend was chasing him. Is this because he has it on his mind that I’m seeing someone, he said on the phone how i was and i told him i’m not which is true.
Please help me out because i would like to know the truth.
Sarah says:
Hi,
I am not a dream interpreter, but if you want to reveal your ex boyfriends “true feelings” for you, go read the free plan on my Blog, and follow ALL the steps.
Take Care,
S.W.