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How to Get Your Ex Back Using The Infamous “Missing” Link

Now That You Have The "Missing" Link Go Use No Contact Correctly

You want to get your ex back, and, you have bought every book out there, but, you still can’t get anywhere, right?

You need the “missing” link.

What is that?

Keep on reading.

It seems a chain is only as strong, as the weakest link.

But, what if it’s missing a link, altogether?

How to get your ex back using the infamous “missing” link.

 


 

The “Missing” Link

 

Every one of those books out there refers to using some version of the no contact rule, as your first step in, getting your ex back.

But, none of them really go into much detail.

I am going to fix that, here and now.

NC is just keeping your ex “out of the loop” personally, while you follow a plan on how to survive your breakup.

Here is how to start, and apply, no contact, in a variety of situations.

 


 

The First Step

 

Politely tell your ex, that you need some time and space, to work out some personal issues, and, you”ll be in touch, when you’re ready.

Also, tell them that you would really appreciate it if they would respect that, and, not contact you, unless it was something like, shared children, or financial affairs.

You can use any version of this you like, but, this is a general idea…OK?

The no contact message is a lot more effective (and powerful) when you’re polite.

 

Scenario 1 – You work for the same company

 

Just keep things polite, and do not engage in any conversations that are personal, just keep it all about work.

 

Scenario 2 – You Have The Same Circle of Friends

 

Pretty much the same advice, be polite, and, do not discuss your personal life with them, or, with your friends, when your ex is present.

Same thing if you happen to run into them, out in public, stay cool.

 

Scenario 3 – You share a child or children together

 

Once again, when picking up, or dropping off your kids just be polite, and, keep it all about your kids.

Same thing when you go to any of your kid’s events, where your ex will be present.

 

Scenario 4 – You’re roommates, live in the same house, but not room

 

Just be a polite roommate, keep to yourself, and, if it is too uncomfortable, make arrangements ASAP, to live somewhere else.

 


 

What If Your Ex, Keeps Contacting You?

 

Politely ignore them, you are not being rude, they are.

If they continue to contact you, resend the recommended NC message, as outlined in the free breakup survival plan.

The biggest excuse there is, (and, I do mean excuse) to break no contact is my ex just won’t leave me alone, so I had to.

No, you didn’t, and, now you have shown your ex, that they can still control you.

Now that you know how to get your ex back using the (not so missing) “Missing” link…get back out there!

If there is still something missing in your attempts to win your ex back, then, subscribe to my free newsletter, and, let me help you.

I can supply you with a chain of information, designed to teach you how to survive a breakup, and, how to get your ex back.

If you have any comments or questions for me, please write them in the comment box below, and, I will answer them ASAP!

 


 

Who Am I and Why Should You Listen to Me?

 

My name is S. Williams, and I have been helping people since 2008, to overcome breakup pain, and, get their lives back.

I even have an “About” section, that I recommend you read.

I realize the address, of my site, is: How to Get Your Ex Back Fast, but, I “really” teach people, how to get their lives back, not just their ex’s.

If you’re interested in working with me, (and our forum members) to get your life back, join my free newsletter, for access to the free breakup survival plan, and, start getting your life back, today.

The answers you need, to start your personal evolution, are waiting for you, don’t hesitate another minute…come, and get them.

Once, you get your life back, everything else will just start to fall into place…I promise.

If you have any comments or questions, please write them, in the comment box, below.

If this article was useful, or helpful, to you in any way, please show your appreciation, by giving me a “+1″, using the buttons, below this article.

Until next time,

S. Williams

Copyright © 2008 and beyond – All Rights Reserved Worldwide – You DO NOT have permission to reuse this content in any way, shape, or form.

416 Comments

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  1. Dear Scott,

    I’d like to thank you for this wonderful blog, I’ve learned a lot of from you. I’m in NC for almost a month now and I’m doing much better now, although there have been some ups and downs I’ve hold up myself strong and shift the focus back on myself by practing the “fast forward techniques”.

    However, I do have an important question for you – after evaluating the failed relationship with my ex, I have come to realize that I was the one who contributed the least into our relationship as I had great trust issues and I was the one always getting mad at him for small things.I’d always taken him for granted. I used to shout at him and used many disrespectful words when I got mad, though he just listened and took it all in.

    Therefore, I’d like to know if NC is the right approach, when you’re the one who hurt your ex most and made them leave you like I did. Won’t NC make it seem like I am trying to hurt them again by being “emotionless” all of the sudden? My ex definitely would be expecting a sincere apology letter from me instead of an NC letter, so I thought this may drive them further away as they may think I am stubborn and did not even contribute the last effort and reflect on my own mistakes after the breakup?

    I’d like to know your thoughts on this. Thank you!

    Catherine

    1. Hi,

      Isn’t it a little late to be second-guessing the no contact rule after using it for a month?

      Anyways, this is about getting your life back, not making up with your ex.

      I help people survive a break up and get their lives back, not get their ex boyfriend back, and I explain why in the “About” section on my Blog.

      If you acted this way around your ex there had to have been an underlying reason to cause you to react this way, right?

      You weren’t born a bitch, were you?

      It takes two people to make a relationship succeed, and two to let it fail.

      This is NOT “all” your fault.

      Your ex boyfriend has some blame in this as well.

      It seems like you are digging to find an excuse to break the no contact rule, and this will only blow up in your face.

      The great thing about NC is that if done correctly (following the free plan, and using the correct NC message) it will cause both people in the relationship to personally evolve, and discover things about the relationship they didn’t notice before.

      Like your revelation about being a “bitch” your to ex boyfriend.

      Just like you, he will have these same revelations about himself (in time), and discover his own short-comings.

      Nothing helps more than when YOU discover these things about yourself, it is a big “a-ha moment” that sticks with you.

      Everyone wastes so much time trying to find a “quick fix” to get their ex back when in most cases “time” is the answer, and you have to learn to be patient.

      Do you know why patience is so rare?

      You can’t buy it.

      You have to learn it, cultivate it, and most people refuse to do this, and then they fuck things up by trying to rush.

      If you and your partner had a true love connection it will NOT fade away so quickly that you have to rush through things to keep them from running off with someone else.

      You have to fight these urges, and stick with the no contact rule long enough for it to work.

      Time is really on your side if you use it correctly, it is not your enemy as most people have come to believe it is.

      Life isn’t a race, it is a journey.

      While it is noble to take all the blame upon yourself, it won’t help your relationship with your ex boyfriend…at all.

      And while apologies are “nice” they don’t amount to shit in the real world.

      Apologies are only words, and actions speak louder than words.

      If you really care about your ex boyfriend, have the guts to stick this out, and let yourselves evolve.

      Take the road less traveled, that is where the “journey” not only gets interesting…but also rewarding.

      Go read the free plan to get your ex back, heal your heart, evolve past the break up, and get your life back.

      You have to be a “whole” person to be able to contribute to a healthy relationship, even one with an ex boyfriend.

      This is the fastest way to get your ex boyfriend back.

      Thank you for writing.

      Take Care,

      S.W.

  2. Hi Scott.

    I have been reading your blog for a couple of days and wanted to ask you a question about the no contact message. My ex and I broke up 2 months ago, but we still live together and were sleeping in the same bed up until 2 days ago. I gave him the silent treatment for a while, but he would always tried to communicate with me and at times attempted to have sex, but I never gave in up until a couple of weeks ago. He kept telling me that he loved me but never said he wanted to reconcile. I was the one that would ask if this could ever work and he would say no. I spent the night at a friend’s house 2 weekends ago and he sent me a text asking if I was okay and to please not ignore him. I sent him the recommended no contact message from your site and he replied, “Fine. I still love you.” I completely ignored the text and him that night. The following morning he sent me a text saying that he realizes that I have moved on and that he was sorry things didn’t work out and that he wished I would have fought for the relationship. I responded that I had tried on several occasions to make it work but he always said that he didn’t think it was going to work and that I was tired of him playing with my emotions. To get to the question, after that is when we started talking again and went out once and had sex that one time. I saw that things weren’t going to change so I sent him another message saying that I did not want this anymore and that I was still looking for an apartment. When he came home that night he asked if I wanted to go to the movies and I said I had plans. I asked him if he got my message and he said no. I told him everything that I sent in the text and he tried together all close to me and holding me. He also asked if I was going to shut him out again and not talk to him. I said no and we were talking and made dinner. I came home really late that night and the next night he started touching me and wanting to hold me. I kept pushing him away and he sent me a text saying he missed me and asked what was wrong with me and why I didn’t let him touch me. I said that this is why I ignore him and get upset because he doesn’t understand. The next day he sends me a text saying that this situation has been going on for 2 months and that he wants me out of our apartment (my name is also on the lease and I paid for half of rent/bills up until we broke up because I needed to save money to move). As of yet I have not responded and completely ignore him. I’m sorry for this being so long and maybe you’ve answered this question, but I want to do this correctly. Should I wait until I move to send the no contact message or should I send it now while we’re still living together?

    1. Hi,

      It would be a lot easier to correctly use the no contact rule after you have moved out.

      Stay away from your ex boyfriend, and keep to yourself, and move out ASAP.

      Once you have moved out and have all your stuff as well, send him the recommended NC message as outlined in the plan.

      I help people survive a break up and get their lives back, not get their ex boyfriend back, and I explain why in the “About” section on my Blog.

      In preparation for when you are all moved out, go read the free plan to get your ex back on my Blog.

      Thank you for writing.

      Take Care,

      S.W.

      PS – It is totally possible to follow the free plan while you are roommates, but since you are moving soon, it wound be better to wait…less drama. 😉

      1. Hi Scott.

        Thank you for the quick response.

        I have until July 1st to move, but I am definitely hoping to move long before that. Technically, he can’t throw me out of the apartment because both of our names are on the lease; however, I know that I have to leave for my own sanity and well being.

        As of three three days ago, I have been sleeping on the couch, and we don’t talk at all or do anything together. You can say that we’ve been doing our own thing for about 2 months. He does, on occasion say hi to me and asks how I am, and I respond with very short answers.

        Since I am not sure if I’ll still be there for the month of June, although I am really trying very hard to movebout before the end of June, do you still suggest I wait until I move or is there a way I can start the plan now?

        1. Hi,

          You can start right away if you want.

          Just pay attention to the articles on the no contact rule, and follow/read all the NC links in the free plan to get your ex back.

          Thank you for writing.

          Take Care,

          S.W.

          1. Good morning, Scott.

            Okay. I’ve been reading the articles quite frequently.

            In my nc message, can I write that during this time I would appreciate if we did not communicate unless it pertains to the money you are giving me and the moving day?

            I will send it once I hear from you.

            Thank you for your help.

            1. Hi,

              This is covered in the free plan to get your ex back, under one of the NC articles.

              If you have shared business to conduct with each other after you send the recommended NC message, include it in the message.

              Just keep it direct and to the point, and all about business.

              The leaner (unemotional) the message, the better.

              Thank you for writing.

              Take Care,

              S.W.

              1. Scott,

                We have no shared business. The money he is giving me was agreed upon after we broke up because when we moved in, we split the deposit on the apartment and bought furniture in which we also split the cost.

                This is why I am asking if this is something that should be brought up in the nc message or once I let him know about the day I’m moving.

                1. Karina says:

                  We have no shared business.

                  Yes, you do.

                  You have an agreement of money to be paid, that is business.

                  Just leave him a note (after you move out) with instructions on where to send the money he agreed to pay you.

                  Or you could tell him when you are moving out, and ask for the money before you leave…your choice.

                  Either way you would not be breaking NC because you are only discussing “shared financial business”, nothing personal.

                  There is no way I could possibly sit down and conceive every possible situation and provide an “exact” solution tailored to your individual needs.

                  This is pretty much common sense if you take the time to understand how the no contact rule as applied in the free plan to get your ex back works.

                  This is all explained in the free plan, and in our forum.

                  This is NOT rocket science.

                  Thank you for writing.

                  Take Care,

                  S.W.

                  1. Hi Scott.

                    Thank you for your response. I sent the recommended nc message earlier today and included the part about the business agreement we had. He waited until he got home and asked if we could talk about the message and what it meant. I just said that I don’t wish to discuss that right now and walked away.

                    Was this the proper way to handle it? What if he continues to ash? Should I keep giving the same response or send the message again?

                    1. Hi,

                      I guess your ex can’t read.

                      Yes, just tell your ex, and anybody else that asks about the breakup or the NC message; “I am not ready to talk about it, please respect my wishes, and I will talk when I am ready”.

                      Thank you for writing.

                      Take Care,

                      S.W.

  3. Simply because it says i agree with the break up.
    does that letter still work for me even though we already
    Been broken up for along time?

    1. Hi,

      Yes, the NC message will work in your situation, why?

      You said your ex boyfriend still contacts you, and it seems like he is playing a game, right?

      He is trying to keep you on his leash until he decides what he “really” wants, but that isn’t fair to you…is it?

      You need to correctly use the no contact rule to evolve past the break up, and get yourself off his leash.

      This is why I help people survive a break up and get their lives back, not get their ex boyfriend back, and I explain why in the “About” section on my Blog.

      Go read the free plan to get your ex back on my Blog, start your personal evolution, heal your broken heart, and get your life back.

      Thank you for writing.

      Take Care,

      S.W.

  4. My ex and I have been broken up for a little over a year.
    We still are on and off with cotacting each other.. I feel like we are still playing
    These games. Does the NC letter still apply to me? Can I still send him
    The NC letter? Or is it to late for that??? Since we’ve been broken up.

  5. For me, he said that he didn’t want to see me again. I didn’t directly tell him I would be making no contact, but it’s what I’ve been doing. But it’s a tricky situation for me.

    We go to the same church and both of us are there every Sunday. I still went, but made sure I wasn’t seen for the first 3 weeks. He broke it first after that, to give back to me something I’d given him as a gift. He went back to ignoring me.

    Mind you, I’ve been doing the No Contact rule. I just don’t want to switch churches because it’s my church, not because I still want to see him. I don’t want to have to give that up because of a guy. I’ve been placing myself in places where I know he won’t be, and if he does happen to see me at church, I’ve made sure that it’s from a distance. We haven’t gotten close enough to meet eyes, let alone speak.

    It was like that for another 3 weeks. This past Sunday he stretched it. He didn’t talk to me or acknowledge me, but he placed himself where he knew I would be. I reacted as if I hadn’t seen him there.

    Am I doing the right thing? I’m not even sure what I’m doing. Does no contact really work? I’m not sure if it’ll work, in my case. I can tell that he’s burying his feelings for me and pushing it aside. Long story short, he feels that the love he felt for me wasn’t “real”, that it was only influenced.

    1. Christine says:

      Am I doing the right thing? I’m not even sure what I’m doing. Does no contact really work? I’m not sure if it’ll work, in my case.

      Hi,

      I help people get their lives back, not their ex’s, and I explain why in the “About” section on my Blog.

      Everything you need to know, and do is included in the free plan.

      Go read the free plan to get your ex back here on my Blog, and follow All the steps.

      Thank you for writing.

      Take Care,

      S.W.

  6. Hi,

    I just happen to find your website today. I actually did purchase Making of Making Up about three weeks ago and already sent the Second Chance letter. I’m on my third week of NC. My ex did try to ask some questions about me on the 5th of NC, but I told him to give me some space and haven’t heard from him since then.

    So my questions is, can I still send the NC letter you recommend?

    1. Jessica says:

      I actually did purchase Making of Making Up about three weeks ago and already sent the Second Chance letter. I’m on my third week of NC.
      So my questions is, can I still send the NC letter you recommend?

      Hi,

      Yes you can, in fact I highly recommend that you do.

      Don’t worry about looking foolish or breaking NC, just send it, OK?

      The second chance letter is weak, and usually doesn’t get very good results, that’s why I created the free plan, to supplement MOMU.

      Go read the free plan here on my Blog, and follow ALL the steps.

      The no contact message is only the first step.

      Thank you for writing.

      Take Care,

      S.W.

      1. Thank you for responding. I just send the NC letter. But do I need to start NC all over again?

        1. Hi,

          It doesn’t matter when you start counting your days on NC, there is no certain “magic” number of days, it is an evolution and takes as long as it takes.

          Thank you for writing.

          Take Care,

          S.W.

  7. hello, wanted to know if i agreed like an idiot to be friends but knew i still had feelings for her but then let her know that the friend shit cud not work, but i have done this 3 to 4 times with friend shit now and this time around she will not respond to any of my emails,and i have sent her a letter that i saw on internet from magic of making up, but ended up emailing her after no response after bout 2 weeks i think she thinks im nuts now lol,saw your contact message and want to get in this program,at present time its been bout week and we speak in passing bcuz at same job but i initiate first and she speaks back is this speaking to each other ok during nc or shud i let her speak first or just walk on by and say nothing , just get my shit together.

    1. Hi,

      I help people get their lives back, not their ex’s, if you want to stay out of the “just friends” zone, and evolve past the breakup, keep reading.

      The correct way to use NC in any situation is explained in the free plan here on my Blog, read it, and follow ALL the steps.

      As far as interaction at work, keep it short and polite, and don’t initiate anything unless it is totally necessary for work reasons, again this is all explained in the free plan.

      Take Care,

      S.W.

  8. hi, friend told me about site long story short ,also showed me nc letter well, tried it ended up as close friends broke nc ,became friends again after mom died, now know i need to get on with my life,never did whole complete program,but see i shud have came here first, so ive broke nc 3 times and sent letter twice and (tw jackson letter once) got her attention both times,but never did your program all the way thru ,now we just speak to each other but she now does not answer my emails i see her at work everyday and its just hi and bye,i think that ive broke off acepting being friends so many times that now
    she wont even consider anything i do,shud i move on or try one last time to go thru whole program, just wonder how poerful letter wud be after ive sent so many times or if there was another one like it out there also each time i broke nc was because of something tragic in my life.

    1. Hi,

      I don’t think a “more powerful” NC message is the answer to your problem, you need to grow a stronger backbone.

      If you are going to make excuses like “tragedies” and other bullshit reasons to break NC…nothing will help you…period!

      I help people get their lives back, not their ex’s.

      If you think you have “the guts” to stick to a plan, go read the free plan here on my Blog, and follow ALL the steps.

      Take Care,

      S.W.

  9. I dont see how its going to work for me or how am i supposed to write the NC letter when he never contacted me and its been a month still no contact? where do i go from here?

    1. Hi,

      You are afraid to do what is necessary.

      You asked for advice, I gave you some great advice (proven to work), and you are afraid to use to…why?

      What do you have to lose that you haven’t already lost?

      If you are letting your pride standing your way, you’re making a BIG mistake.

      Like I tell my 13 year old son, there are two ways to do things.

      The hard way, or the easy way.

      You choose.

      Take Care,

      S.W.

  10. okay.. So does that mean I should still send the NC thing even though it seems forced/out of nowhere

    1. Hi,

      Yes, if you want the best results from the free plan, follow ALL the steps.

      Send the recommended NC message without any changes.

      If this makes you feel uncomfortable don’t do it, and look for a plan you feel more “comfortable” with.

      Take Care,

      S.W.

  11. Scott, I am tired of going on to forums where everybody depresses each other about their break ups and no contact and how difficult it is..It just makes me feel more frustrated! I am at the point where I want to DO SOMETHING about it! I have not spoken to him for 5 days and he has not bothered asking me how I am..He lives two hours away and I know he is spending a few days here in my town with family but has not bothered texting me as he always used to when he was here..He absolutely adored me..He was proud of being with me because I am an ex model..He used to pannick if he thought I was out seeing somebody else..He truly did love me!..He is much younger then I am but honestly, it was never and issue for us..We were extremely close and compatible in every single way..I can not understand his sudden cold and silent treatment..I am guilty of doing the text and email thing where I sent numerous a day..trying to get him to realize what he is throwing away..It has not helped at all! I now need to resort to something different..I need to know if there could be a chance if I start on this system? First of all he lives two hours away, he is younger and there might be somebody else and that is why he has lost interest so abruptly and suddenly!

    1. Hi,

      First off, I don’t help people get their ex back, I help them get their life back.

      If you’re interested in working hard to get your life back, and to be happy again…keep on reading.

      Go read the free plan on my Blog, and follow ALL the steps.

      Take Care,

      S.W.

  12. My exboyfriend broke up with me about 8 weeks ago and we were together for 2 years. i was a wreck but forced myself to continue my daily life and even go out more and meet new friends. I read selfhelp books and have been really trying but still miss him. the contact between us has been very minimal, only text msgs and never started by me and i’ve always been short (never told him how i missed him). our last contact was when i saw him out, we spoke briefly and politely..afterward he texted me saying how we really cared about me and wanted to keep in touch. since then i sent out a mass text with my new # cause i got a new phone and he responded initiating convo. but i didn’t answer. we haven’t talked since. I really want him back but have also learned a lot about myself and our relationship. Do i send out a NC msg even though we basically haven’t been and he hasn’t been trying? or do i reconnect casually?

  13. Hi S.W.

    I want to join the site and follow all the rules as I have tried everything and it has not worked. I really want to get my life back and would love to get my ex back too. I have a question about No Contact in my situation.

    You see. We work together. I actually have not been to work in a lil over a week since our last conversation which turned into a full blown fight. I felt completely betrayed and decided to completely cut every form of communication off, since we work together and he also would call me or stop by my cube to visit me etc, everything was just a viscious cycle and he wasn’t giving me what I want.

    Any who, I changed my phone number and blocked him from my e-mail address. I have another 5 weeks off of work possibly more (I’m looking for a new job).

    How do I send him a No Contact message when he can’t reach out to me if he doesn’t have my phone number and I blocked him from my email address? He does have my work email and phone number but I’m not at work and I really don’t plan on going back. I’m looking for a new job and plan on finding one. I also plan on moving out of my current apartment when the lease is up or before that. So how do I send the No Contact message in this situation. I do have a phone connected to my pc and he still has that number?

    But I feel stupid sending him the No Contact message when I basically told him he lost me forever and I changed my cell and blocked him from my email address and have not been back to work, and plan on getting a new job and apartment. Sometimes I still want him back. I definitely want to get better.

    Thanks in advance!

    1. Hi,

      The free plan is not about getting your ex boyfriend back, it is about getting your life back.

      Do not over think a simple plan, just follow ALL the steps and you will see the results your deserve.

      Getting a new job and place to live is a GREAT idea.

      Go read the free plan on my Blog, and follow ALL the steps.

      Take Care,

      S.W.

  14. Hello SW.

    My ex initiated contact by email last night. Telling me how hurt she is about what we’re going to miss out on in future and what she’s going to miss about our relationship, yet telling me that she’s accepted that it’s over. She wishes I had some magic formula to make it all go away but then says we’re past that now. (She broke it off) She ended by asking me to collect my things from her home and telling me I’d broken her heart.

    Some aspects of the email seem pretty damn final, yet others are possibly glimmers of hope for the future. Time will tell on that I guess.

    My question is, do I initiate NC now and collect my things later? Or do I wait until I’ve collected my things to initiate NC?

    1. Hi,

      Yeah, she’s sitting on the fence about this break up, and all that is going to do is give her an ass full of splinters (if the fence is wooden).

      In this situation I suggest wasting no time at all collecting your things, and then send the recommended NC message as outlined in the free plan.

      Go read the free plan on my Blog, and follow ALL the steps.

      Take this time to focus on getting your life back, and to personally evolve past the break up.

      Take Care,

      S.W.

  15. scott hey, after reconnecting to soon i found out that its all about me being back to myself again, i let ex wither back into my life and put me back in friend zone bcuz i was not ready well after weve been back n forth about with emails talking bout who is at fought i sent no contact message finally back to her and now i get it that its not bout thiry days but more about when i can get my life back and not care whats going on with her, just wondering if i did it right by sending no contact message again word for word even though it was during email fights i have not responded to her emails eventhough she steady sending them even after nc message.

    1. Hi,

      As long as you didn’t reply to her emails after sending the NC message again, you did it right.

      Now follow ALL the rest of the steps in the free plan.

      Stay Strong!

      S.W.

  16. and my girl is off to korea after graduation so I have 3 months to win her back if she still loves me, is 1 month NC enough.

    thank you so much

  17. Hi,

    I agree with you about the decision to break up, I really believe it was the best thing for both of us. I have some big decisions to make and I need some time to think them over. I would really appreciate it if you didn’t contact me during this time. I will be in touch when I am ready.

    any other NC message other than this for someone that broke u with you

    Im afraid that she sees in your site that i copied the exact message.

    and is there still a chance even if she repeatedly say that I should not hope anymore and she will not come back, that I am not a part of her future anymore

  18. that was fast.thanks

  19. When in no contact, should I greet her a merry Christmas? or what if she greets me? should i answer?

    1. Hi,

      Great question!

      That’s probably why I covered it in the free plan, go read it, and follow ALL the steps.

      Take Care,

      S.W.

  20. ok, I am sorry, I’ve found it. i guess, the msg out of relationship limbo would be good.:-)

  21. Hi
    the plan seems great and i want to go for it since I have not been happy with my current relationship. I am just a little confused with one thing – if I have not yet broke up with him yet, how should I do it? It seems as the NC message is only AFTER a break up as a follow up, am I right? I would love to break up over a message, email so i would not get emotional but at the same time I would feel that is rude. Please advice.

    p.s. I’ll do whatever works to get him back;).

    Thank you in advance.

  22. I’ve been broken with my ex for over a year now. We barely talk as is, but we do tweet/ comment on facebook sometimes. I’m not really desperate but I do want him back. But I dont want to pay any money if it’s already too late. So…is it too late for me? Have I waited too long?

    1. Hi,

      The free plan is about getting your life back, and evolving past the break up, it is not about getting your ex boyfriend back.

      If you are still tweeting and chatting you didn’t use no contact properly.

      You didn’t make a clean break.

      This is explained in the various articles on my Blog.

      If you would like to make a clean break from your past with your ex, go read the free plan on my Blog, and follow ALL the steps.

      Take Care,

      S.W.

      1. I guess my question is really is it too late to even consider getting him back? If so, do I even need to send a NC letter? If I have no plans of ever reconnecting with him, is the NC letter even necessary? And I’ve been through the NC thing before. We did not talk for about 3 months and then suddenly started again. I actually wrote him an email asking him not to contact me before that period as well So, writing “I understand why we broke up” is a little redundant at this point.

  23. i sent the recommended NC letter…n den he came back..
    within a week again we are having troubles..
    I fucked up my situation…
    I know and accept
    What to do now??

    1. Hi,

      Now that you have personally witnessed what happens when you fuck up, go back and start over, this time stick to the fucking plan, OK?

      Go read the free plan on my Blog, and follow All the steps.

      Take Care,

      S.W.

  24. First of all I would like to ask a simple quick question, If I’m having trouble retrieving a password, each time I do it still refuses to let me login. what can I do?

    I’m eager to start my forumn! 🙂

    I’ve recently started having problems with my girlfriend. We would fight over issues such as going out to a club or hanging out with her friends. I admitted and realized I was wrong to her many times after we broke up still she would not budge. This is when I realized I needed REAL help. This girl means so much to me and I know she still loves me so much cause she says and well, I can sense it.

    During our relationship she had went behind my back and talked to someone new. Maybe pursuing them? then confronted me and fessed up. I told her I would forgive and we could work on it. Fast forward three months to present day and She tells me sometimes she thinks we would be better off as friends cause of our disagreements but I feel different. This girl REALLY loved me, and I still feel she does.

    I made the mistake after our break up of not giving her space. I begged her to give me a chance, and it simply didnt work. So now here I am, lost and confused. Hoping this site will help me. So today I talked to her on the phone and we agreed on not talking for a few days but now reading this I realize I need to start the NC ASAP.

    So, please help me get started with my password login issues first.

    What is your advice on my complicated situation?

    thank you so much for everything! You truly have helped me already!

    God Bless,

    Dena

    1. Hi,

      You were never approved for forum membership.

      Sometimes the system screws up and sends a password before you are approved.

      There is an approval process you must complete in-order to become a forum member.

      You need to re-register and then follow ALL the instructions on the email you receive after that.

      Make sure you read everything, and follow ALL the rules or you won’t be a forum member for very long.

      I am VERY serious about people following the rules.

      Take Care,

      S.W.

  25. hey scott, just had a question about some thngs going on with me and ex.couple weeks ago we started back going out, and i could notice she was very i guess cautious about us, i really felt she had not evolved,bcuz i was starting to feel like im in friend zone, we hav been recently going out but once we hit back to her place she seems like she always sleepy or basically trying to get rid of me,my instincts have finally won me over bcuz other night on way to a nba game she got a call that she answered and she was telling this guy that it was not going to work out between them and ,i was shocked that she cud do this right in front of me,of course i didnt react i played it smooth and now im certain she doesnt look at me in a attractive or shud i say i really thnk i really fucked up in trying always to show her how much i care and now i see that my availability to her when ever she wants to hang out is actually showing her im weak ,so today eventhough we talked and laughed this morning im really ready to sock it to her i mean i dont want to be spiteful but its time for her to see the other side of me,just not sure how to go from here ,or do i send nc message again .,bcuz yes that call did bother me so maybe im not fully evolved cuz i know now she is not.

    1. Hi,

      It sounds like you either broke NC too soon, or moved too quickly after reconnecting.

      I suggest re-sending the exact NC messages (no changes), and then following ALL the steps in the free plan.

      This time plan on staying in NC for 4-6 months to give your ex girlfriend time to evolve, and move past the old failed relationship.

      The real key to success is to focus on getting your life back, not your ex girlfriend.

      Take Care,

      S.W.

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