How to Get Your Ex Back in 2010 – 3 Proven New Year Resolutions to Get Your Ex Back

Do you want your ex back in 2010? Here are 3 proven ways to get your ex back again, and start the year off right. Make these sure fire resolutions, and win your ex boyfriend, girlfriend, wife, or husband back fast.

Win Them Back Resolution 1

The first resolution you have to make is to stop chasing your ex. That means not just text messaging, emailing, and showing up at places you know they will be, but it also means mentally. You have to promise yourself you will not obsess about getting them back. You have to let them go physically, and mentally as well. You can accomplish this if you sit down and formulate a good plan using the no contact rule to keep yourself socially busy, instead of scheming how to get your ex back…make sense?

Win Them Back Resolution 2

Once you have an idea of how you’re going to let them go mentally. Then put those ideas into action. Go out with friends and family, and stay active socially…But! Do not talk about your ex or your break up, OK? If you bring that gray cloud over your head everywhere you go, you will end up with no friends, along with no boyfriend or girlfriend. Remember you were supposed to let your breakup go…so do it. Your second resolution is to “walk the talk”, which means to act upon what you said you were going to do…don’t just talk about it…OK?

Win Them Back Resolution 3

Now that you have decided to let that little gray cloud go you need to do a little more to move on from your old “failed” relationship. Many people are afraid that dating will send the wrong message, and will not help you get your ex back. But, they are wrong! This works on two different levels to your advantage.

First, it builds your confidence and helps you to mentally let go of your old relationship. Second it is fun and your ex will now start to realize you might never come back…now they start to panic inside. Even though you are only moving on from your old relationship, it will seem that you are over them completely…this flips an emotional switch, and your ex will start to chase you. As crazy as this all might sound, these 3 steps will help you get your ex back in 2010, or maybe sooner.

Who Am I and Why Should You Listen to Me?

My name is S. Williams, and I have been helping people since 2008 to overcome break up pain, and get their lives back. I even have an “About” section that I recommend you read. I know the name of my site is: How to Get Your Ex Back Fast, but I teach people how to get their lives back, not their ex’s.

If you’re interested in working with me (and our forum members) to get your life back, join my free newsletter for access to the free plan to get your ex back fast, and start getting your life back today. The answers you need to start your personal evolution are waiting for you, don’t hesitate another minute…come and get them.

Once you get your life back, everything else will just start to fall into place…I promise. If you have any comments or questions please write them in the comment box below.

If this article was useful or helpful to you in anyway, please show your appreciation by giving me a “+1″ using the button below this article.

Until next time,

S. Williams

Copyright © 2008 and beyond – All Rights Reserved Worldwide – You DO NOT have permission to reuse this content in any way, shape, or form.

76 Comments

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  1. Dear Scott,

    Yesterday my very kind forum buddy sent me the MOMU book online. I had a read through it. However, I am having problems in the most important area and that is emotional control. There are times when i am fine and there are times when i tend to break down and cannot stop myself from crying. Its been around 4 weeks of not speaking to each other..initially I didnt feel the break up so much but now after 3-4 weeks, its really taking its toll on me. I have tried the FFT but I cannot seem to control my emotions at times. Scott i live alone and my parents are just here to visit. they will be leaving in a month and I am scared how I will cope then. I dont have many friends here. Its really hard on me this breakup as he used to keep me company…and now he is gone. Scott, please help me..I need some hope and advice..its really difficult for me.

    1. Bella says:

      Yesterday my very kind forum buddy sent me the MOMU book online.

      Yeah, that was REAL “kind”…lol

      You are both fucked up, why?

      You both violated a copyright law, and that is stealing.

      Your unhappiness comes from other things in your life besides your break up, and what goes around, comes around.

      I guess it’s not enough to get a free support system you (both) have to steal on top of it, karma is a bitch.

      Thank you for writing.

      Take Care,

      S.W.

  2. Dear Scott,

    From my break up story and situation, do you think I have a chance of getting my ex boyfriend back? I cant help it, but I am still holding on the little peice of hope I have left that he would come back someday. He is a really stubborn person and I dont know if it would be that easy that he would come back after all thats happened and after the nc message..I do miss him very much still..

    1. Hi,

      You have a 50/50 chance to get your back using the no contact rule.

      Thank you for writing.

      Take Care,

      S.W.

  3. Oh BTW my friend just miss called him..didnt talk to him..just checked wether number was working..hmm..Scott, the nc msg was sent through text..I didnt email or anything..so its really important that he got the msg in the first place..other people in the forum have had responses from the exes after sending the nc msg so they know that their ex recieved and read the msg but I had no such response so hoping to God he got it. His number is active so he must have gotten it…

    1. Hi,

      There are many members who never get a response, and it is not because their ex didn’t get the NC message, it is because they chose not to respond.

      After all, the NC message asks them to not contact you, right?

      Thank you for writing.

      Take Care,

      S.W.

  4. Hi Scott!

    Thanks! I’m going on that date on Thursday! Scott, I shouldve thought of this earlier I know but I told you that I sent the nc msg 5 days ago without thinking wether he changed his number or not. Today it kind of dawned on me wether his number was still active so that he really did get the nc msg. I asked a friend of mine to check with another unknown number to check wether was active or not still. My friend called him and found out that the number was active. That means he did get the nc msg that he got my nc msg. My ex did not call back on that number or anything. This doesnt count as breaking the no contact does it? please please let me know. thank you.

    1. Hi,

      Your friend calling your ex isn’t breaking NC.

      Make sure you don’t tell your friends what you’re doing, it is best to keep your personal evolution to yourself.

      This is why I have set up a free self-help support system.

      This way people following the free plan to get your ex back, and the no contact rule, can talk and support each other through our forum buddy system.

      Thank you for writing.

      Take Care,

      S.W.

  5. Hi Scott,

    Its been only 5 days of NC since I sent the NC message. Other than that it will be almost a month that we havent spoken to each other. After i sent the NC msg, he didnt contact me or anything. I know this is all about personal evolution and I am really trying..I’m trying to spend as much time with friends and family and going out a lot. I know there were times he hasnt been good to me and he broke up with me but somewhere deep inside I still want to hold on to a little hope that he would come back one day or contact me one day. I know right at this moment, it doesnt seem like he wants me Scott. Thanks when you reassured me about the dating..it made me feel a lot better about going out and having fun..but somewhere I also feel a need to ‘reserve’ myself for him for the future. I know I should enjoy my life and I’m really trying..believe me..its just really difficult to ‘let go’ sometimes. scott, I dont have your book but I am following the plan. Will it be less effective without the book?

    I know the free plan tells me that I would have to let go of the old relationship to make room for something new..but hope is whats keeping me sane Scott.I sincerely hope that I can grow positively with my evolution as long as it takes. As always, thank you for taking the time to answer so many questions from myself and others.

    1. Hi,

      As long as you “reserve yourself” for him, you will stall your personal evolution.

      You will not evolve as quickly and you will be unhappy.

      The free plan to get your ex back, and the no contact rule are meant to help you get your life/happiness back, not your ex boyfriend.

      The you stay obsessed with getting him back, the longer you remain stuck in relationship limbo.

      I help people survive a break up and get their lives back, not get their ex back, and I explain why in the “About” section on my Blog.

      People have been successful without buying the book, but people who have purchased the book The Magic of Making up have personally and emotionally evolved at a faster rate.

      Thank you for writing.

      Take Care,

      S.W.

  6. Hello Again Scott,

    Just need your opinion on this one: I mentioned before about dates. The guy that asked me out for dinner, my ex didnt really like him ( this is the guy that my ex spoke to on chat on facebook when he hacked into my account and tried to find information about this guy’s feelings for me). This person does like me..but I dont really have a thing for him at all..just a nice and fun person to hang out with. He asked me out this Thursday for dinner. I’m feeling really guilty cause my ex didnt like him and didnt want this guy liking me when i was with my ex. But he really is fun to be around and respects what I like to do..but I’m not attracted to him. Would it be a good idea to go out on Thursday instead of sitting at home and being depressed thinking of my ex? I know I’ll have a good time minus any romance..just as a friend..but I feel really guilty.

    1. Hi,

      You have no reason to feel guilty, your ex boyfriend broke up with you, right?

      Go out, have fun, enjoy your personal evolution, the guilty feelings will pass in time.

      Apply the no contact rule to your ex, not the rest of the world.

      Thank you for writing.

      Take Care,

      S.W.

  7. Hi Scott,

    The text that he sent me was this: Hello! Hope everything is well with you. I became ill again and its been two days. I didnt play games with you….. I loved you and wanted you. I’m unable to forget. But this relationship will not be fruitful in the future..you know why. I have a couple of your things with me..I will ask someone to send them to you later on. Take care. Bye.

    I have just translated the break up text as it was in my language. yes I know Scott..he left me. I am really serious about following your plan Scott and sincerely want to reach that stage where I can be happy regardless if my ex boyfriend comes back or not. I feel fine sometimes but other times, the memories keep coming back and its really hard to control emotions. The forum is great and really helping me a lot. Thank you for your advice.

  8. Hi Scott,
    I had some questions:

    1) He broke with me about 1 week ago through text, but in actual fact he didnt avoided me the week before that ( thats when i went over to his house twice cause he wouldnt receive my calls or texts). I sent the NC msg word for word after one week I received his text, cause I came across your website after he sent me the text msg to tell me that this relationshop wasnt right for the both of us. Is this ok that I sent the NC msg after 1 week he sent the text? Otherwise, if I knew about your website before that, I would’ve started the NC msg before he sent the text when he was avoiding me a lot. What do you think?
    2) He came from Canada two years ago and is meant to leave sometime this year due to his immigration purposes. he mentioned before the break up that he may leave in September this year or by the end of 2011. How will I ever know now when he will leave this year or if he will surely leave in September which is just 1 month away? What if I’m going through my evolution and by September he leaves the country? I kind of feel a little upset when I think of this..( I’ve also applied for Canadian immigration and it will be done by the beginning of next year..we decided before the break up that we would travel there together..now..I really dont know after the break up).
    3) i feel wierd going on dates or even going out with my guy friends. I feel guilty when they ask me if I would like to go out fo r dinner or coffee or soemthing like that. There is this one guy who I knew since 4 years but I do not like him..let alone love him at all..but he’s fun to hang out with. He called and asked me to go for dinner with him this thursday. I know he’s a fun person and he will be fun to be with and it def take my mind of my ex and I know I will enjoy the time with him but I do not like him that much. What do you think I should do in such a situation.

    Your comments on these aspects would be really appreciated Scott..I’m still a little vulnerable as i only started my forum posts yesterday and my personal evolution very recently.

    thanks.
    3)

    1. Hi,

      The free plan uses the no contact rule to help people get their lives back, not plan how to get their ex back.

      I would say 80% or more, of the people who were positive they wanted their ex back, found out they really didn’t after letting themselves (fully) evolve past the breakup.

      This takes time (6-12 months) and patience.

      Only panicking people will worry about time lines, and people in a state of panic have NOT evolved…make sense?

      You need to find out if it’s even worth getting your ex boyfriend back first.

      You need to listen to what he is saying, he said this isn’t good for both of us, he can’t speak for you, but he sure can speak for himself, right?

      Furthermore, his actions will speak louder than his words.

      Don’t listen to what he says, watch what he does, he is leaving you.

      Stop trying to pretend you know what is best for “both of you”, and focus on what is “best for you”…your happiness.

      You can only be happy with someone who WANTS YOU, right?

      Don’t worry about anything except your personal evolution, and getting your life back again.

      As far as dating, give it time, things will change I guarantee you they will, once again this takes time, be patient.

      Just be honest about your feelings and intentions with the guys who ask you out…honesty is always the best policy, right?

      Instead of worrying about getting him back, you should be worrying about giving your heart to the wrong man.

      I help people survive a break up and get their lives back, not get their ex boyfriend back, and I explain why in the “About” section on my Blog.

      Stick to the free plan to get your ex back and follow ALL the steps to heal your broken heart, evolve past the breakup, and get your life back again.

      Thank you for writing.

      Take Care,

      S.W.

  9. Hi Scott,

    Thanks so much for your quick reply..I joined your forum anyway and even if he did do anything, he wouldnt be able to find the real name in the forum. The reason I was worried is because he did this in the past. He got into my facebook and started chatting to an a guy friend of mine so that friend that I was the one who was chatting..my ex was testing me wether I like other guys or not which I think is complete paranoia..I was really upset. Somehow he has problems with me talking to other guys. He did this before as well another time where he started talking to one of my guy friends on yahoo messenger and that person thought it was me. He als hacked into my hotmail account and read all my personal emails from my dad, my workplace, etc..he is a computer science major student so I guess he can do these things. He has problems with my past relationships..I dont see the big deal cause those were in the past so I really dont know why he is so suspicious and so paranoid. I love only him and I’ve said this to him many times. I’ve changed the passwords to all my accounts (fb account deactivated and hotmail account pword changed)..hmm..God knows..I wouldnt be surprised if he got the new passwords and hacking my accounts again. very immature behaviour on his part.

    1. Hi,

      As far as security goes…use very strong passwords of alpha-numeric and special characters with at least 20 characters or more in them, and then change it weekly or daily.

      You can find password generators online for free to help you come up with these huge diverse passwords.

      Being lazy with your passwords is how you get hacked.

      Thank you for writing.

      Take Care,

      S.W.

  10. Hello Scott,

    I registered yesterday to your forum but I’m kind of afraid to write my breakup story and NC diary as there is a chance of hacking by my boyfriend ( which he has done in the past twice). Anyway, its been 2 weeks since he broke up with me where he avoided me my calls, my text messages..everything. I even went over to his house twice when he didnt answer my calls or texts but he also avoided me when I went outside his house to ask for him. A week later, he send me a text saying that he loves me and he wanted to marry me, but he could see that this relationship didnt have a future. He further stated that he is trying to erase the memories but he cannot forget. After that text one week ago, I didnt respond at all and remained quite..until I came upon your blog where I read the free plan. I sent the no contact message word for word the day before yesterday, exactly, one week after he gave me the break up text. Our relationship broke down for a number of reasons where both of us were at fault and didnt quite understand each other fully. I still want to give this relationship another chance as I feel it ended as many things were going to fast, especially my clinginess and neediness which I showed him too soon and the constant crying and nagging which really annoyed him and he became fedup. I also thought he has many things he also needed to improve for this relationship to survive..hence all the crying and nagging. Anyway Scott, I would really like to get him back again and have started towards my personal evolution..its been two days since i sent the NC message..your blog is absolutely great…

    1. Hi,

      If you use our forum correctly your ex boyfriend will not find your account.

      The free plan explains that you MUST be discreet. There is no need to post incessantly everyday outlining everything you said and did, that will only get you banned from posting.

      The best part of the forum is the ability to find forum buddies with which you can communicate with “privately” after exchanging email addresses. This kind of support will be very helpful to keep you from breaking the no contact rule.

      I help people survive a break up and get their lives back, not get their ex boyfriend back, and I explain why in the “About” section on my Blog.

      Go read the free plan to get your ex back and follow ALL the steps to heal your broken heart, evolve past the breakup, and get your life back again.

      Thank you for writing.

      Take Care,

      S.W.

  11. Annie wrote:

    Hi SW,
    first off, happy new year! I hope 2010 has been treating you well!
    My main concern is about the no contact rule. The ex and I have been broken up since 2006, I still stayed involved with him until 2008 and it wasmy fault that I never changed my ways. Now that I think of it, I took him for granted all those years. I would get angry whenever he would tell me at the time he didn’t want a girlfriend or why we couldn’t get back together, and he would tell me not now. I knew the reason was because of me and my actions. I blamed him for what I couldn’t change myself. Everytime I’d get mad or controlling, I would tell him I never want to talkto him again and that’s what happened in 2008. A week later after we had spent time together, I knew something had changed within the quickness. I felt there was anther woman. I was right, that’s when I found out he was already seeing someone new. I had no idea, I was devastated. I cried until I couldn’t cry anymore. It hurt a lot. I let a couple months pass, about 7 months, knowing he was still with this newgirlfriend and did something I expected not to turn out the way it did. I confessed my love to him, all through text, asked him why he never tried to contact me, if he felt anything towards me, justeverything I wanted to know for the past 7 months of no contact. Expecting him to at least say something in return, I never felt so rejected in my life before. He mentioned he didn’t know what he felt towards me, he texted me why did I wait so long to ask him this and that I shouldve contacted him before he had a girlfriend. I was lost, vulnerable and so hurt all over again. As much as I wanted to try to contact him the first time I even heard about him seeing someone new, I stopped myself. What was messed up of me and very selfish was that I did contact him when he was already with someone new.
    Even during this text conversation, I kept pushing his buttons, if he had anything else to say, he said no, I texted more still asking if he was really happy, he replied back, yup. One of the last things I texted was that, “it would help me a lot if you told me to leave you alone” and I was in awe when he texted back “please do” I still went at it after leaving the last text at “you think I’m crazy huh” and I never heard from him until this very day of 2010.
    I am going to admit, I tried calling, with my intention of apologize about a month after that all happened in 2008, but what I got in return was tht his number was not a working number. It killed me all over again that he actually cut me out of his life, and really, I thought he never would. I know one of the last things I texted was that it would help me if he told me to leave him alone, I just didn’t expect him to go with it. That’s what backfired on me and it still hurts til this day, maybe not as much, but I am still very clearly able to remember what happened that very time.
    He was my first love, I was his second, the whole time we were involved- dating, actually a couple and post break up added up to about 5 years. I’m still trying to heal and move on.
    How does the no contact rule work in this situation? I try to tell myself that he’s done me a big favor by changing his number, but I keep thinking, waiting he’s going to text me or call me. Last thing I heard about him was him and that girlfriend broke up and I never imagined that to happen. I hope he’s doing well, whther he’s still single or working things out.
    I don’t want to be a fool and look like a big fool again if I try to contact him. I do have mutual friends where Im able to find out his number, I just feel it’s foolish of me to do so. I still think of him til this day and just wish I could apologize for acting the way I did. But if he really did go out of his wayto change his number, Im having trouble accepting this after so much time has passed.

    hey Annie…
    just like thought to share somthing with u regarding watever u wrote here. just dont take it as interference but all of us over here are lovelorn. nothing different in ur case.

    Scott is “good” is the least i can say when u are “hurt” or “rejected” or “depressed”. i have taken tons of advices from him and presently at my 4th day of NC. EVEN I LOVE MY EX A LOT and u do too. but Annie, remember YOUR LOVE , for which u are giving in so much, holds too much of esteem and dignity to cry or sulk because u lost him today. remember its TODAY. u still dont know he might happily come back to you tomorrow!! really. and that is all u are here for. Scott will guide u the best but as far as i have seen, guys have a tendency of taking girls for granted (and i am NOT being feminist). your crying begging sulking and re;peating “i love u…take me” is just like a safety net over him. he is cocooned in it. he bloody KNOWS u are there begging. hence is NOT rea;lising ur value. snip off the net. this world is too tough. it won’t be late when he will realise what he has lost and will want back that cocoon…ur love.

    u are in love annie. its not a crime. why should YOU sit and cry??
    u should LIVE ur life and rejuvenate urself while waiting for him. work on ur mistakes. maintain ur self esteem as ur love is true. who wants to come back to a sulky looser with zero self esteem when the world is full of entertaining beautifull and laquered girls???

    dont women endure monthly period pains?? waxing pains?? labour pains?? then why cant u “smile” and endure THIS pain for the sake of getting him back again Annie???

    i have myself experienced, NO1 REALISES THE WORTH OF THE THING THEY ALRESDY HAVE, TILL WHEN THEY START DRIFTING APART.
    when u are in love,its never too late. good thing is he is broken up wth that girl. now is the time u need to follow each of scott’s advice to get him and ur life back.

    just a sincere and friendly piece of advice Annie 🙂
    nothing more.

    have faith. its never too late.

  12. Hi SW,
    first off, happy new year! I hope 2010 has been treating you well!
    My main concern is about the no contact rule. The ex and I have been broken up since 2006, I still stayed involved with him until 2008 and it wasmy fault that I never changed my ways. Now that I think of it, I took him for granted all those years. I would get angry whenever he would tell me at the time he didn’t want a girlfriend or why we couldn’t get back together, and he would tell me not now. I knew the reason was because of me and my actions. I blamed him for what I couldn’t change myself. Everytime I’d get mad or controlling, I would tell him I never want to talkto him again and that’s what happened in 2008. A week later after we had spent time together, I knew something had changed within the quickness. I felt there was anther woman. I was right, that’s when I found out he was already seeing someone new. I had no idea, I was devastated. I cried until I couldn’t cry anymore. It hurt a lot. I let a couple months pass, about 7 months, knowing he was still with this newgirlfriend and did something I expected not to turn out the way it did. I confessed my love to him, all through text, asked him why he never tried to contact me, if he felt anything towards me, justeverything I wanted to know for the past 7 months of no contact. Expecting him to at least say something in return, I never felt so rejected in my life before. He mentioned he didn’t know what he felt towards me, he texted me why did I wait so long to ask him this and that I shouldve contacted him before he had a girlfriend. I was lost, vulnerable and so hurt all over again. As much as I wanted to try to contact him the first time I even heard about him seeing someone new, I stopped myself. What was messed up of me and very selfish was that I did contact him when he was already with someone new.
    Even during this text conversation, I kept pushing his buttons, if he had anything else to say, he said no, I texted more still asking if he was really happy, he replied back, yup. One of the last things I texted was that, “it would help me a lot if you told me to leave you alone” and I was in awe when he texted back “please do” I still went at it after leaving the last text at “you think I’m crazy huh” and I never heard from him until this very day of 2010.
    I am going to admit, I tried calling, with my intention of apologize about a month after that all happened in 2008, but what I got in return was tht his number was not a working number. It killed me all over again that he actually cut me out of his life, and really, I thought he never would. I know one of the last things I texted was that it would help me if he told me to leave him alone, I just didn’t expect him to go with it. That’s what backfired on me and it still hurts til this day, maybe not as much, but I am still very clearly able to remember what happened that very time.
    He was my first love, I was his second, the whole time we were involved- dating, actually a couple and post break up added up to about 5 years. I’m still trying to heal and move on.
    How does the no contact rule work in this situation? I try to tell myself that he’s done me a big favor by changing his number, but I keep thinking, waiting he’s going to text me or call me. Last thing I heard about him was him and that girlfriend broke up and I never imagined that to happen. I hope he’s doing well, whther he’s still single or working things out.
    I don’t want to be a fool and look like a big fool again if I try to contact him. I do have mutual friends where Im able to find out his number, I just feel it’s foolish of me to do so. I still think of him til this day and just wish I could apologize for acting the way I did. But if he really did go out of his wayto change his number, Im having trouble accepting this after so much time has passed.

  13. zenia wrote:

    why is the NC msg so important b4 starting the NO CONTACT???

    I have covered this in the free plan, and on a couple of articles, but here is why you need to send the recommended NC message first.

    Because it is the first step of your journey, and your journey will not start until you take that first all important step.

    You can study a map forever, but you will never reach your destination until you take some positive action, and take the first step.

    It flips an “emotional switch” in both you and your ex.

    Once you do this and get 30-60 days under your belt you will have an “ah-ha” moment and understand…I promise.

    Take Care,

    S.W.

  14. S. Williams wrote:

    Ruby wrote:
    I realised the error of doing that very quickly and initiated complete no contact. NC has been going on now for several weeks.
    Hi Ruby,
    Are you following the free plan?
    Did you send the recommended NC message word for word?
    If not you did not initiate NC properly, and you need to start over again from the beginning of the free plan.
    If you’re following the free plan, and using all the support tools you should already have an answer to your question.
    Take Care,
    S.W.

    i ahve read ur free paln thruce by now: )

    its grt actually i must say. but 1 thing, just outta curousity,
    why is the NC msg so important b4 starting the NO CONTACT???

  15. I do miss my ex, but not enough to go spilling to the guys.. its not there problem… but missing him, isnt effeccting my progress. I feel amazing. I dont feel tired down or controll. Im in controll for all the right reasons.

    I am feeling confrident, I am feel positive, I am happy I am going to show my ex I DONT NEED HIM, I am kicking loves ass and I am staying strong.

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