Comments on: Does My Ex Miss Me? – How to Get My Ex Boyfriend Back

By: S. Williams

S. Williams — Wed, 18 Jan 2012 12:00:09 +0000

Hi,

It sounds like you’re in the “friends with benefits zone”, and the paying for dinner, and “snuggling” are just some of the things he is willing to do for the “benefits” of “unattached sex”.

You are screwed (not in the good way) if you don’t wake up and stand up for yourself.

You can’t marry someone if they don’t want to be married.

The reason the dating isn’t working out is because you’re not putting “much” effort into it.

If you put as much effort into correctly using the no contact rule to evolve past this break up and get your life back, as you do into trying to convince yourself this guy is the one, you would be a lot happier.

Drugs make people feel happy for a little while, but what happens when they wear off, in the long they cause way more pain/damage than pleasure.

You need to break your addiction to this guy, there is a big difference between obsession and love, and “booty calls” and a meaningful relationship.

I help people survive a break up and get their lives back, not get their ex boyfriend back, and I explain why in the “About” section on my Blog.

Go read the free plan to get your ex back and follow ALL the steps to heal your broken heart, evolve past the breakup, and get your life back again.

Thank you for writing.

Take Care,

S.W.

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By: Rena ann

Rena ann — Wed, 18 Jan 2012 06:19:40 +0000

Hello- I was with my ex-boyfriend for over six years.We have been separated for just over a year now. We tried to work things out a few times and then just stopped talking. Recently we have started talking again. He has taking me to dinner a few times. He has stayed over once. If he just wants to be friends why does he pay for everything like we are together? Why does he want to snuggle? But then everytime we start to get close he says we are just friends and sorry if he was misleading me. Im glad we are talking and hanging out again. Just not sure what to do or how to take this. Does anyone have any advice? I love him with all my heart. I have tried to date but nothing works out because I truely feel this is the man Im suppose to marry

By: S. Williams

S. Williams — Mon, 19 Sep 2011 19:04:04 +0000

Hi, I would just delete your email, it was good therapy to write it out, but you won't get the results you are after by sending that to your ex. Anytime you feel you have something to say to him, write it in a home journal, but don't send it to him, you will regret it. The best way to reveal your ex boyfriend's true feelings for you is to use the no contact rule correctly. It doesn't matter if you broke up with him, there is a version of the (recommended) NC message for that situation, read the plan. I help people survive a break up and get their lives back, not get their ex boyfriend back, and I explain why in the "About" section on my Blog. Go read the free plan to get your ex back and follow ALL the steps to heal your broken heart, evolve past the breakup, and get your life back again. Thank you for writing. Take Care, S.W.

By: Poetess

Poetess — Mon, 19 Sep 2011 18:52:57 +0000

One week ago, I broke up with my boyfriend of 8 months because of commitment issues (his fear of/refusal to). He revealed that he had unresolved feelings from a previous relationship (from years ago…and he ws still in contact with her sometimes). Two days after the breakup, he has emailed me, apologizing profusely for hurting me. I did not answer. A few days after that, he texted me about returning some items that I left at his house – I didn’t respond to that either. I do want him back, but not now. I want him to work through his issues before I could take him back…but I also want him to realize what he has and that he doesn’t want to lose me. I feel that’s already happened a little, since he initiated contact. I have typed out a response to his email, explaining what I desire in a relationship, I want him to take time to work thru his issues, and that I can not/will not take anything less…but I have not sent it yet. My question to you is: since I broke up with him, and he’s already contacted me with an apology, should I go ahead and send the email I wrote now, wait to send my email (if I should wait, how long??), or initiate your NO CONTACT??

By: sheika

sheika — Thu, 18 Aug 2011 17:10:13 +0000

I was dating this guy from my job and he broke up with me. I was so hurt,I asked him why, i was sorry, and he just said that we wasn’t or I wasn’t ready.he had a lot of issues with him.but I think i loved him. so , i ended that conversation with me saying that i was hurt, and i didn’t call for him for a week i even stayed home from work. so when i went back to work, i saw him in the hall and we talked for a hour, he wanted to know what i been doing, he been going on face-book to see my status and my pic, he told me all this when he saw me, he even told me he had free time for two weeks and he was going to spend time with me. and in that moment, i thought he was trying to get back with me, and when the time came nothing he stop picking up my call again,I feel he is seeing someone else.and what hurts me is when i see him at work he wants to talk and smile in my face.
so, what i did this time around when he didn’t pick up my call i deleted him from my face-book, so he won’t see whats going on in my life. I took a little vacation from work so i won’t see him for a while, and his position at work he can tell if i am there are not.but i am so hurt.but i want him back.. but i know i need to stay away for a while

By: S. Williams

S. Williams — Mon, 15 Aug 2011 21:34:41 +0000

Hi, First off let me say this, 30 days is only a bench mark and 99% of the time is never long enough for the no contact rule to work effectively. The majority of these break up success stories will attest to that statement. I am not sure what you meant by "you followed the rules", does that mean you followed ALL the steps in the free plan to get your ex back? Spying on your ex will not do you any good, and is definitely a sign of desperation, which means you were not ready to reconnect with your ex. You said he is leaving out of town for 10 days, right? I suggest you wait a week after he gets back, and if he doesn't contact you, send the recommended no contact message as outlined in the free plan to get your ex back and start your personal evolution. Make sure you review chapter 6 of The Magic of Making up for more details on the reconnection phase in-case he does contact you after he gets back...make sense? Now, if he contacts you and just wants to be friends, start following the free plan to get your ex back, and send the NC message. The last place you want to find yourself in, is, "the just friends zone", also known as relationship limbo. The reason NC hasn't worked for you is probably the fact that you didn't follow ALL the steps in the free plan to get your ex back. I help people survive a break up and get their lives back, not get their ex boyfriend back, and I explain why in the "About" section on my Blog. Go read the free plan to get your ex back and follow ALL the steps to heal your broken heart, evolve past the breakup, and get your life back again. Thank you for writing. Take Care, S.W.

By: Kay

Kay — Mon, 15 Aug 2011 21:02:24 +0000

Hi! So It has bEen more than a month I followed the rules etc. I also am following the magic of making up. So I called him and he answered right away and said how surprised he was that I called. We talked for a bit and told me how he’s going away for 10days the following week. So I said oh I guess that ruins my plan to meet up for lunch next week and he quickly responded saying what about this week?! So we met up two days after that call. Oh and 2hra aftter that call he texted how surprised he was to get a text from me and I said j hope it was a good surprise an he said defiantly a good surprise. Anyway we hung out for no more than 45mins we didnt talk about the relationship. 20mins after I left he texted me “it was really good to see you even if it was only briefly” I responded saying yes it was fun! He wrote back saying we should catch up again when he’s back in town.
Anyway he hasn’t initiated a text since then. I initiated a Text once telling him something funny. He’s gone today for ten days.
I donno what to do now. I donno If he’s just happy cause he thinks we can be friends again. we were in love and together more than a year. Do I stop initiating contact again? I miss him.
I do know that he has been talking to an ex of his they dated like a month three years ago. I’m tempted
To check her fb to see if he writes to her.
You’re help would be greatly appreciated. I just don’t know what to do now.

By: Monkey

Monkey — Tue, 02 Aug 2011 04:19:01 +0000

Also, I guess this could help other people in my situation. Its all about that fact that our exes know us very well. We are used to letting our guard down with them and that first contact is much like a first impression. You HAVE to be on your game or else you just messed everything up.

Even if I do feel ready, I’m still going to bring a friend. Just to make sure I keep my guard up and keep things short. Business is business. Change isn’t always bad, I’m making a choice that can only prove to be a good thing for my life. I can’t let my ex stand in the way, especially since that really lies with me. Choice is a POWERFUL thing. We all need to remember that.

By: Monkey

Monkey — Tue, 02 Aug 2011 04:09:53 +0000

thanks!!! I’m probably gonna end up having a friend come with me. Me and my ex were together 2 years so…it won’t be easy to just say I’m not ready and leave it at that.:/

I know myself oh so well haha

thanks again

By: S. Williams

S. Williams — Tue, 02 Aug 2011 03:37:35 +0000

Monkey says:

I just need help on how to give him his things back. What I should say if he wants to talk.

Hi,

This is explained in one of the NC articles linked to the free plan.

If he tries to talk about the break up, the no contact rule, or your current personal (dating) life.

The best way to reply would be to say: “I am not ready to talk about that right now.”

This statement will reinforce what you said in the NC message you sent to him earlier.

The worse thing you can do during NC is to send “mixed signals” this will only piss your ex boyfriend off and confuse him.

Stick to the free plan to get your ex back, and do not break the no contact rule.

Thank you for writing.

Take Care,

S.W.

PS – If you feel this would be too much for you, you can always have a friend do the exchange for you, or come with you when you do it.