Does My Ex Boyfriend Want Me Back? – 3 Revealing Signs

 
Follow A Good Plan To Find Out If Your Ex Boyfriend Wants You Back
 


 
You can read your ex boyfriends mind and see if he does want you back, just look for these 3 revealing signs.

If your ex wanted you back, it is not difficult to see, because body language, is very hard to hide.

If you know what to look for, you will see right through his words and into his mind.

So, lets get started, so you can find out; “Does my ex boyfriend want me back or not?”
 


 

Over Reacting

 
Does your ex boyfriend tend to over react?

Does he say things like; “We will never get back together!”

If so, he probably still has strong feelings for you.

When someone over emphasizes something, they usually mean the exact opposite of what they are over emphasizing.

People think they can hide their true feelings with anger…this is not true.

So you ask if my ex yells at me; “Does my ex boyfriend want me back?”

The answer is “yes” he still has strong feelings for you that he is desperately trying to hide.
 


 

What A Coincidence

 
Here is another revealing sign.

Do you find yourself running into your ex boyfriend a lot?

Does he always seem to be showing up at the places he knows you hang out at?

Then he pretends not to see you until he catches you looking at him, and then he approaches like you called him over or something.

A-ha!

He is following you around and that means he is still very much attached to you.

If you keep tripping over your ex boyfriend like he was your shadow, I would say he still has strong feelings for you.

So,”Does my ex boyfriend want me back?”

I do, I really do think he wants his ex girlfriend back, but, he is too stubborn, to admit it.
 


 

Just Thought I Would…

 
Drop you a line to see how you have been?

OK, this is another revealing sign that your ex boyfriend wants you back.

Do you know what those little dropped lines really are?

They are hooks…each little note is a way to keep you hooked on thinking about him.

Oh, how thoughtful that my ex boyfriend worries about me even though we are broken up.

It is not just being thoughtful your ex boy friend is keeping his memory foremost in your mind, so you will not start dating someone else while he is trying to figure out what to do.

He does not want you to exchange him for someone else.

If you are experiencing these 3 revealing signs (or something close to them) then your ex is still interested.

It’s time to act.

Does your ex boyfriend want you back?

Well, I would say, the best way to find that out, for sure, is to follow a good plan for reconnection.

Go find yourself, a good plan, and start working on, getting back together, with your ex boyfriend.
 


 

Winning Your Ex Back

 
What?

You want to know if your ex boyfriend wants you back.

And yet, you still do not have a plan?

It is hard to get to your destination without a good map.

If you have any comments or questions, please write them below in the comment box, and I will answer them ASAP!

Does your ex boyfriend want you back?

What can I do to help you find out?

What are you willing to do if he does want you back?
 


 

Who Am I and Why Should You Listen to Me?

 
My name is S. Williams, and I have been helping people since 2008, to overcome breakup pain, and, get their lives back.

I even have an “About” section, that I recommend you read.

I realize the address, of my site, is: How to Get Your Ex Back Fast, but, I “really” teach people, how to get their lives back, not just their ex’s.

If you’re interested in working with me, (and our forum members) to get your life back, join my free newsletter, for access to the free breakup survival plan, and, start getting your life back, today.

The answers you need, to start your personal evolution, are waiting for you, don’t hesitate another minute…come, and get them.

Once, you get your life back, everything else will just start to fall into place…I promise.

If you have any comments or questions, please write them, in the comment box, below.

If this article was useful, or helpful, to you in any way, please show your appreciation, by giving me a “+1″, using the buttons, below this article.

Until next time,

S. Williams

Copyright © 2008 and beyond – All Rights Reserved Worldwide – You DO NOT have permission to reuse this content in any way, shape, or form.

356 Comments

Add a Comment
  1. @ S. Williams:
    Hi Williams,
    I have a serious problem to discuss.
    I was married for 4 years to my husband but we never had any serious love or passion.At that time I met a person from work who was one year younger to me.We were friends initially but then it became a very serious and intimate relationship.I understood what love was really and he loved me truly as well.
    But after about 6 months the relationship became an on and off one with him acting loving one moment and hating me the other moment.
    When I asked him what was happening he finally opened up.He said he could not bear me being with my hubby anymore and that he cannot spend his entire life thinking what Iam doing at night as he loves me more than anything else in his life.I was completely stormed with emotion.
    I promised him there would never be any guy in my life again and that I wont touch my husband ever again.
    I detached myself from my husband and cut off everything.My hubby did not have major issues with it and said if the feelings are not there he was ready for a divorce.
    In the meantime my boyfriend again was on the rollercoaster mode loving me one moment and hating me the next.
    He also used to make me cry all time by cutting my calls and making me feel insecure and by showing his work frustration on me as well.
    But the times his mood changes and he is sweet self he loved me like he was mad about me.This was true for both the on and off bed.On bed he was passionate wanting and ripped me apart everytime with his love.
    We went out on trips on 3 occasions.
    During the last trip we were just only having sex and on the last nite I burst out asking him if he really wanted to marry me or was playing around.He got furious and angry.Exactly 2 weeks later he called it quits with me.I felt hit in my stomach and did the ugly begging,crying,calling,texting thing till I fell down in exhaustion.
    2 days post this I returned to office but with a bright face and confident look to get over him.I went to say hi to him and his eyes looked at me with so much pain that my heart melted.He said he was angry with me for the way I was pressurising him but realised my value only after he lost me.I told him about the divorce and later in the evening he called me to his desk and said “I left you because I wanted you to get back to your normal life.If thats not happening then Iam there for you.”
    It was back to love and love again.in the meantime he had told me abt his problem of being unable to see with his left eye.i didnt know it till then and was shocked.i promised him i wud never leave him.he said he is sensiive and cannot bear it if i leave him.We were happy and he was loving me with all his heart till exactly one month.
    He took me to a restaurant and I told him abt the painful things of the divorce.I talked to him saying “I have not get over the breakup wit you.Now its too much to handle”.He said “I never left you.I will never ever get a girl like you”.He said he loved me more after the breakup thing.The very next day I got a promotion in office and I told him abt it.He got jacked by his manager for some reasons around the same time.
    He became changed after that.Stopped talking to me and concentrated fully on his career.This became too much I started to miss him a lot and one nite when I kept on calling him he said”i hate you you b****.you are spoling my life and I never ever got back with you.we are done”.The next day I went to him and said sorry.He was angry but still spoke to me,lunched with me.In the meantime I met with an accident and was not goin to work for 3 weeks.He did not call me and did not pick my call for one week.Then on the 2nd week when he did pick up he was like “I was worried abt you.but at the moment my mind is too fragile and on my work completely”.After I returned back to work I asked him you dont like me shall I leave you and go.He didnt reply but his face became serious and he was like go if u cant stand me.
    Then he started to tell me not to lunch with him as he started to lunch with his team and it wont like nice if I join there.didnt talk to me.didnt pick my calls.nothing.at last one day I told him I packed my bags and Iam leaving the city.he said ok fine.In the evening I went to him and asked him this”you are busy now and cannot pay attention to me as your career is at stake.but you have not forgotten me.”he said “yes” and i saw a very lonely and sad look in his eyes.this was ok.he even said we will go on a trip soon.then one day in the morning i went to him to say hi.dont know wat mood he was in.he went outside office called me and blasted me saying”i hate you i dont want u in my life and u r trying to be with me like a leech.u r spoiling my life and my career.”this time i felt it was for real.he was angry but 2 days later became normal.but told me we will be jus friends and nothing more.since then he has not spoken anything much to me.i then told him i have taken up some special prayers which a priest told me for restoring vision in his eye.he seemed thrilled and happy with it.
    then one evening i told him i want to have one last talk with him before i leave the city.he looked at me sheepishly and said iam scared to talk to you.i said if u wat me to leave then talk to me for one last time for which he said pls leave me free for 1 month as i have some office commitments which can cost me my career.then i called him 2 days later and said lets talk it out on the phone.he said if u r desparate for a man go with anyone i dont care.but as far as iam concerned everything is over and i have forgotten everything.iam now focussing only on my career and i dont want u to kindle my feelings.i asked him u said u r sensitive and cannot be without me.is that a lie.his voice changed and he said u know me.iam sensitive thats y cannot handle this relationship as it does not allow me to do anything in my career.pls leave me.i cried and cried badly.then i called him inthe evening and said how much passion did u show while we were on bed how can u dump me like a used tissue.he replied saying stupid girl go and sleep now.dont trouble me else i will come and poke ur cheeks and kept the phone with a chuckle.post this i have changed myself and stopped all my begging and become the smiling beautiful girl i was.i accepted the fact that he is over and i thot i must move on as well.
    i have been doing this for last one week.he seemed not to care.but last 2 days he is looking extremely angry and troubled.when he sees me straight to face in office he kept his face in a rigid manner and did not speak or smile.
    he still uses the coffee cup i gave him.wears the shirts and watches i gifted him.when i say hi to him in the morning he says hi and doesnt talk anything more.in spite of all this never at any point in time did he ask me to get back with my husband and be happy.
    he said i cant handle this now and if i come back to you my career focus will go.he is sincerely working as i can see.post the fight with him saying he is over me he happened to see a picture of me with my cousins on my desk and asked me where did u take this one?when did u go?did u go on a trip or was it nearby.he seemed curious to know when it was taken.

    ok my question now is wat is the status of this relationship now
    is he over me as he claims?is he thinking he can come back to me anytime if he does wat he wants in his career.
    fyi he is a very emotional and sensitive aquarian.he seems detached completely and is very arrogant when his mind is busy with something but the moment he looks at me he used to fall flat.he has told me always that he wont get a beautiful,graceful,sensitive,loving woman like me ever who can understand him and be patient with him.even in office ppl say he is very difficult to handle.shd i move on or wait for the love of my life by being patient.if i wait will he come back or will it hurt me more later when i know he has truly moved on.he doesnt talk to me or look in my direction. in fact he tries his best to avoid looking at me and turns away if he has to pass by my desk.is he so angry with me for hurting him.i dont know.i admit i have hurt him by shouting and fighting many times.
    need your help to understand his behaviour.sorry for the long comment but this is my last chance at my life.

  2. @ melissa:
    Hey Melissa! I read your story and I can feel for you because I’m in a simuliar situation. I broke up with my ex back in April and I regret it so much. I have loved this man for 25 yrs. He has alot of issues going on and I got impatient and wanted things now. You see I was extremely close to his family. His dad and I were tight and he loved me alot. It’s a long story but his dad thought I was talking about him through other people that I work with[these people are friends with his dad’s employee] they would say things about my ex that supposibly happened and it wasn’t even true. I called and asked his sister and she wanted to know who told me and I told the truth. Well the guy lied and said I said all thius stuff about the family. The guy has worked for them for about 26 yrs. I have known the family for about 35 yrs and my dad worked for my ex’s dad and I was friends with all of my ex’s sisters. I haven’t tried to make things right with his dad because the woman I work with is best friends with my supervisor and I know my job will be in jeopardy. My ex knows about what happened and he said that everything will work itself out just trust him and be patient. He had so much going on also. He has Chrone’s Disease and needs more surgury and was put on a new medication and he is impotent because of that. He’s had a drug problem in the past and has been clean for 3 1/2 yrs. When he texted me and told me that he had a relapse I automatically thought it was the drug relapse. this happened right after I broke up with him. We have loved each other since we were teenagers and we definitely have that chemistry. He always comes back to me everytime. He told me he needed space and I’ve given it to him and it’s been so hard. He texted and said that he met someone else and believe me I’m devestated. My friends and family thinks he only said that to hurt me because I hurt him and plus he has a medical condition that is affecting him sexually. You see when he came back to me he said that weve wasted enough time and he should have always been with me and he’s always been in love with me and will be for the rest of his life. My oldest son would text him[he’s not his son]and beg him not to leave. My ex always loved my son just like his own and was always good to him. He asked my son to give him to September when things are better and then he’ll be in touch. But when he texted me and said he met someone else I got very upset and told him I was severing all ties with him and I never planned on seeing him ever again. I told him that from then on the only thing we shared would be our son,he’s 13. I miss him so much and think of him everyday. His sister has reached out and asked my oldest son to work for her. I feel this was planned by her and my ex.She has a landscaper and doesn’t need my son. I begged and pleaded with him right after we broke up and he moved further and fyrther from me. I haven’t texted or called in about 2 months and I know he’s curious. He doesn’t know anything about what I’m doing and I know he’s curious.I know he has alot on his plate and his biggest concern is medical condition and how it’s affecting him sexually. He had planned on a nice romantic dinner for us in his new apartment. He lived about 45 minutes away and moved up here to be closer to me . He had made dinner for me and had the works. Later when things started to get intimate things went downhill for him and he was devestated and embarrassed. He said it must be his new medication. I assured him I was ok with everything but he was worried about making me happy. Not long after I broke up with him not because of that[I’ve been through his medical problems before] just that he is a workaholic and we didn’t spend alot of time together. I ended our relationship by voicemail. STUPID I know and I regret it believe me but I know he loves me still he knows I do dumb things here and there and I know he’s angry and just lashed out at me to hurt me too. No contact is very difficult believe me I want to call him so much it hurts but I find something else to do,like telling you my story. I know he’ll be back I just have to give him the space he needs to get his life together. When the connection,love,chemistry,and everything it takes to have a fantastic relationship is there they know. He has known me all his life and he knows I love him unconditionally[he tells everyone that]he will be back.You just have to keep telling yourself to have zero contact and it will work[I am getting a little here and there]. He came by my house the other day and parked behind my truck for a few minutes. Hang in there and intiate no contact. Good Luck!

  3. R.Renata wrote:

    Thanks to talk with me. i feel unconfortable in talking with my friends about it because now he is married.

    Well to tell you the truth from what you wrote to me and I quote:

    R.Renata wrote:

    I was married for 7 years, i meet this guy at work and i fall in love for him. And he sayed he was in love fom me as well, i left my husband and he left his wife to start a new life.

    I assumed when you said you “left” your spouses that you both divorced them before living together…this changes everything.

    Did you both only get separated from your spouses?

    Are you divorced or separated from your husband?

    I am confused now…

    My advice is to leave him alone until he gets divorced, until then you will never know if he was serious or not…right?

  4. Well its truth.
    But now its a bit to late i think, because he is back home with her.
    And he say to me that he had to forget me.

    I was thinking on first find another job so we dont work at the same company.
    Put my life back on truck, because i left everything as well once i left home.
    And then text him and try to convince him in fight for his happiness, if he accept its because he does love me, if he dont then its because was a lie.

    What make me sad on think that way but i have to be realistic.
    I dont know if will work or not, but it will give him time to make sure of what he really wants.
    And will give me time to organise myself.
    outside and inside.
    I left everything for him, and i didnt regret, and my ex tried to do the same with me because i have a son as well, but i know how to fight back and get control of my life.
    He need to do the same for himself, i cant force him to do anything or he can blame me later if she decided to do something.
    I will contact him at the end of next month.
    I will not know what to say, because he dont want to be my friend and i dont know why as well.
    If he trully loves me he will come back.

    Any idea on what to put at the msg when i contact him?

    Thanks to talk with me. i feel unconfortable in talking with my friends about it because now he is married.

    When we finished he say its was over. Now i dont know if he say it because of all the problems or because he didnt love me no more.

    For me its a bit weird when someone loves you on a week and the next say he dont.

    My only hope its he change his mind.

    And if he do i will do everything as possible to help him.

    Thanks..

    1. He is a lier and a cheat!!! He NEVER loved you! lol

  5. R.Renata wrote:

    He cant go to court because he left everything to her, the house that he still paying for it, but who lives there its her, because of his son, and when we was together he was paying the house, and giving some money to her because of the kid.
    And he will miss his son like crazy into the court decided, and his parents as well.

    Even if he is low on money he can still get visitation rights.

    He might’ve given child custody to his wife but he still HAS PARENTAL RIGHTS to see his son with an agreed upon visitation schedule set up by the courts or with a mediator.

    R.Renata wrote:

    I fell like i am losing the love of my life. And its nothing i can do.

    Wrong!

    You can do something about it, contact him and ask him about following through with setting up some appointments with an attorney.

    You can always help him with the fees if he needs it.

    He needs to exercise his parental rights, she (his ex wife) has no right to deny him visitation of his son.

    Plus why does she (his ex wife) want a man who doesn’t love her anyways…this all doesn’t make much sense.

    It is a house of cards that will soon crumble.

    My advice would be to contact him with a plan to fight for visitation rights for him and his parents (after all they have rights too)…maybe his parents can help with the legal fees as well.

    You see if you all were to unite (you, your ex, and his parents) together you all could fight this woman and get what you all deserve…but you have to fight back, understand?

    There is no reason to give up until you have exhausted every possible way to solve this problem first, I do believe you can solve this.

    1. LEAVE him alone!!! Why would you want to reck someone’s family??? SELFISH!!!!

  6. Once i asked him why he would go to the court and the answer was, i’m a brock men.
    Because he left everything for me.

  7. Hi, S. Williams

    Thank you very much for answer.
    He cant go to court because he left everything to her, the house that he still paying for it, but who lives there its her, because of his son, and when we was together he was paying the house, and giving some money to her because of the kid.
    And he will miss his son like crazy into the court decided, and his parents as well.
    He was living with his parents, because he had no where to go.
    But i told him that time would put things right, but he is to impaciente.
    She told him as well that was me or his son.
    I think his parents started to put presure as well, not because they like her but because she stoped then from see they grandson.
    As you see everything its complicated, he sayed once that we r like romeo and juliet but without the death maybe he was right.

    I fell like i am losing the love of my life. And its nothing i can do.
    He dont like see me because i think he feel bad about it.
    The only think i can do its wait and see if he come back, but into that happen i will fell rubbish.

    Do u think i should let go?
    Because i do think that sometimes but i am leting the person i most loved go, My problem its that i think with my heard.

    Thanks…

  8. R.Renata wrote:

    If he loves me why is he back with her?
    Its because of his son and his family or because he likes her?

    From what you told me I would assume that he left because he didn’t want to lose the ability to see his son.

    Why didn’t he go to court to fight for his right to see his son?

    His ex wife can’t deny him visitation just because she is mad at him…he has rights as a parent too.

    1. Why don’t you find a man that is not married! He probably tells his wife he loves her too! I am sure they have a much longer past then the two of you. Next time your married maybe you won’t cheat on your husband:)

  9. Hi.S Williams

    I was married for 7 years, i meet this guy at work and i fall in love for him. And he sayed he was in love fom me as well, i left my husband and he left his wife to start a new life.
    But things started to get complicated, because we work at the same company and his ex deceded not let him seem his son, what made him left me after 2 month and go back to her.
    I was really in love for him and i dont know what to do now, I feel that i have lost the love of my live. when we was together it was perfect and now he is gone.
    I am not trying to get him back with him because he is with her.
    But i want him back, if thats truth what he told me, that he love me.
    I got lots of question on my head and i have no answers for it.

    If he loves me why is he back with her?
    Its because of his son and his family or because he likes her?
    Its because of the money?

    But i dont have any of the answers and its just making me mad.
    He dont talk to me now, but sometimes he sees me and his face changes,i can see in his eyes that he feel something for me.Its my imagination?
    But why he left me, i am so confused.

    Please if you can help me it would be great, because i dont know what to think or what to do.

    Thank you..

  10. @ S. Williams:
    hi!ive already joined! =)

  11. Becca wrote:

    istill love him and would do anything to be with him again.

    If you want help to get your ex back follow this link:

    http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/topic/read-this-first

    Make sure you read the rules and guidelines before you join, I strictly enforce them.

  12. melissa wrote:

    i want him back but it does not seem to be working…

    If you want help to get your ex back follow this link:

    http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/topic/read-this-first

    Make sure you read the rules and guidelines before you join, I strictly enforce them.

  13. hi scott,
    i broke up with my ex 5 months ago..through out this period i missed him very much and i still do till today..for the first 2 months of the break up i ignored him totally but deep down i missed him alot.during that period i bumped into him a couple of times but we did not talk to each other we jus texted each other n said “i think i saw u”.and jus left things as it is.on the 3rd n 4th month i texted him alot n eventually we met each other 5 months after we broke up.he gave the excuse that he wanted to come over to pick up his things.we texted me a couple of times to say to meet up but i said i was busy.then one day i texted him n said “pls jus come over n pick up ur things.i dont wanna keep it anymore. he came over looking angry n said “i jus came to pick up my things n im leaving now.’ then i said “y do u aws do this?u jus run away without saying anything.i hugged him n said i missed u so much.” he said “i missed u too” we talked abt wat hes doing currently n it was ok till i started talking abt the rship..he dare not look at me at the face n jus said he doesnt wanna talk abt it..then he jus took off..

    ever since the incident ive been texthing him n calling him but he doesnt answer my calls..but he replies my messages when i text him n ask him how hes doing.sometimes i text him n say “it has been a while since i last met u?how r u?r u fine?if ure sick hope u feel better soon” n he will say ‘im ok.dont worry.i hope ure good too”

    the other day i was having drinks with my friend talking abt him n i started crying n telling my friend how much i miss my ex.my friend suggested that i texted him n tell him i wanted a second chance.my ex replied “its not about the chance,im not that good either.pls dont blame urself” i feel that im crazy.i dont know why i cant forget him n why it hurts to much everytime i think of him..it has been almost 5 1/2 months since we broke up but it still hurts everytime i think of him.i want him back but it does not seem to be working…

  14. Okay so my boyfriend broke up with me about a week ago..
    becuase he was stressed with assighments and college work. lame excuse. but he said he just wanted a break from everything.
    but i recently foudn out hes now with someone else who he works with i kno it wont work out but thats not for me to say,
    anyway the other day when talking on msn he said he still cares about me alot of that he will always have feelings for me but we CANT get back together, hes confusing me becuase he sometimes rings me asking if im with his mate dan :S he says we shudnt text or call for a bit only e asked me what i was up to a few hrs later. im so confused with what this guy wants from me! ive ignored him for about a day and a bit now and ive had nothing from him.. i kno the only way to win him back is to ignore him but it seems impossible.. does he seem like he wants me back?

    and is ignorin him gna work?
    istill love him and would do anything to be with him again.

  15. Michele wrote:

    What’s up with this guy?

    I guess he just wanted to get that stuff off his chest so he could “move on”…or maybe like you suggested, he’s just a “Spazz case.”

  16. Hey, I’m confused. My ex-boyfriend from 2004-2005 contacted me while I was at the dance club. It’s 2009. I’m wondering why he finally wants to talk to me. He begged me to give him a ride. I said no at first, and then I felt sorry for him so I gave him a ride. He offered to take me to IHOP. I was really hungry so I said OK. Then he starts criticizing me about the relationship. He says I cheated on him, and that’s why we broke up. The reality is he broke things off with me. I’m very attractive and went out the next week and kissed another guy. He says that’s why he barely talked to me over the years because he was still pissed about it.

    I just don’t understand him at all. Why approach your ex from 2005 when it’s 2009. Oh and btw, he was asking me about my relationships and bfs that I’ve had. I didn’t give the details. I thought everything was ok, and I’d just hang out at his place after he invited me. I don’t think of him sexually anymore. He asked to sleep with me at the apt., but I declined. He said it was because I have feelings for him that I declined. I just think he is soooo strange. I mean if you want to have sex, find someone new and exciting, not an ex. I feel bad for him because all he has is a friends with benefits girl, and no gf. I’m not the friends with benefits girl. He thinks it is so great that he has that girl. I just find it strange. I wouldn’t brag about something like that. I feel sad about the situation. I am just wondering why on earth he would talk to me after 4 years. I mean we ran into each other every so often, and chatted slightly, but never like hanging out. And he really laid the criticism on me when he got the chance. Spazz case.

    What’s up with this guy?

  17. Hey Sahr2, just came accross this site and your story intrigues me..I just wanted to know if the NC rule worked?…It looks like 3 months had passed..any progress??

    keep in touch!

  18. Sahr2 wrote:

    I was thinking that the NC rule probably best applies to those who recently broke up with their ex, however does it also work for people who contacted their ex numerous times, even though the ex preferred they did not? I really wish I stumbled upon your blog last year, but things happen for a reason.

    This plan will work for anyone who gets it, follows it, and most importantly believes in it.

    A big part of anyone’s success getting their ex back is believing that they can.

    The best plan in the world will not work if you don’t have faith in it, as well as faith in yourself.

    This is a plain and simple universal truth.

    This is why emotional control, or maintaining your emotional well-being is so important while using any plan to win back your ex.

  19. Hi Scott,

    I was thinking that the NC rule probably best applies to those who recently broke up with their ex, however does it also work for people who contacted their ex numerous times, even though the ex preferred they did not? I really wish I stumbled upon your blog last year, but things happen for a reason.

    Anyway, as I continue the NC rule, I thought that my ex by now is probably wondering what happened to her? By this time, I would have already contacted him, but I didn’t. So I guess, now I’m on his mind which may lead him to wonder what happened to her and what is she doing?

    thanks,
    Sahr2

  20. Sahr2 wrote:

    Hopefully I will stick to the NC rule.

    You can do it, just think about working with NC 3 months to get your ex back for a lifetime…OK?

    Sahr2 wrote:

    Anyway, thanks for writing these articles because they have been useful and quite motivating!

    You’re welcome…that is what I am going for educate and motivate.

    To me knowing what to do is only half the battle, staying motivated long enough to use what you have learned to see results, is the other half.

    So stay motivated 🙂

  21. Hi Scott,

    I just wanted to update you that I have not contacted my ex for a month now, and I feel fine. I definitely have more confidence and feel like life can go on without him. Of course, I will still be happy if he contacts me, but I will just give it another 2 months and see what happens since he said he needed 3 months. Hopefully I will stick to the NC rule. Anyway, thanks for writing these articles because they have been useful and quite motivating!

    thanks,
    sahr2

  22. Evon wrote:

    He did mention to my girlfriend (his colleague) that I was not like this when we were seeing each other and perhaps we were really not suitable for each other

    Hi Evon,

    When people first meet it’s usually the physical attraction at work, after that they really get to know each other, and sometimes they are not happy.

    But sometimes when thing “heat up” very quickly people start to get scared, and find anyway to get out because they feel things are moving too fast, or they are becoming too attached, and that scares them.

    What if you dump them?

    Maybe they should dump you, before they get too attached…understand?

    I am only throwing these examples out there so you can understand there are many reasons why people decide to leave.

    Did you read the section called “Why Lovers Leave“?

    There are more insights listed there as well.

    If you want to work on getting him back, get yourself a book to work with, and use my Blog to form a plan of action.

    Take Care,

    S. Williams

  23. Thanks Scott, it is heart warming to hear from you.

    I had been trying to get myself distracted, reading up self-help books to improve on myself and taking up yoga classes etc. I know I was not changing for him but the fact that he was the catalyst to make me want to improve and work on building a better person in me.

    He is really a nice guy/friend/boyfriend but he is also more of the contented / mediocre sort while I am more of the ambitious sort, always climbing to reach a higher end. Perhaps that is why our characters clashed? And we were always arguing especially on issues about careers (for that one-week-constant-arguments that ended the rs) which are sensitive issues to men and I know I shouldn’t have insisted on it, making him change for what I assumed it was good for him. I didn’t make an effort to compromise. Because he was always so nice and patient with me, I’d taken him for granted which pushed him even further away. I know I made a terrible mistake, it was my bad and he had reached his ultimatum.

    I had known him since 2007 but only as friends/ acquaintance whenever there was a gathering. We’d started dating only just last end year. It was a totally different kind of rs, we slowly take our time to date, he did not want to rush into anything, just purely getting to know me better (it was me that had shown a little impatience). Well, we got together in a committed rs in Feb but sadly, things got heated up very quickly and within a month, he chose to end it and left just like this. He did mention to my girlfriend (his colleague) that I was not like this when we were seeing each other and perhaps we were really not suitable for each other. Now that I want to repent for my mistakes, he chose to close the door on a chance for us.

    So Scott, do you agree that perhaps he was not really interested in me to begin with? Otherwise, how could he end things just so fast within a month? There are rough patches in the rs, but it’s how we handle it and not escape/ use a breakup as a solution to a problem right? Or was a test between us? I can’t seem to make out a reason behind this whole issue. I just feel there’s more to this rs, it’s so ‘half-way-done’ and definitely we can work something out. Or is it because some things are just not meant to be and that I had it once but ruined it so now I had to suck it up myself? Certain things are just too late for us to realize and repent?

    I really don’t know what I should do next, I wanted to move on but I am willing to give it another shot as well. And if we stick to NC still, I am afraid with the space and distance, he would have come to terms with the demise of the rs and the new path in life during the times he had been detached from me. The ball is in his court, with NC, I don’t know if I should decide to give things up when it had only been a while and there were not many memories from the rs to evoke him to reconsider a chance.

    Thank you for your time, Scott. I know it was long entry. Your advices are greatly appreciated.

    Evon

  24. Evon Chen wrote:

    These emotional ups and downs is affecting me quite badly. As much as I want to believe in a leap of faith for the chance to reconcile, at times it seems that I am really at my wits and those hopes and strengths are slowly retreating away in me.

    Hi Evon,

    It sounds like you need to take a break for trying to win him back.

    I would go back into NC and stay there, don’t do anything until he is open to sitting down and discussing a real relationship with you, not just being friends.

    Sometimes when you walk away from someone they suddenly want you back, people usually want things they can’t have.

    He knows that you’re waiting for him, and that is what is holding him back.

    Plus, I would really focus on the arguing problem, and a way to end it.

    Instead of focusing on getting him back so much, start to focus on building a life without him.

    I believe that if he truly still loves you when he sees you moving on he will react, when he does use chapter 6 and set up a short meeting to get to know each other again, and then take it from there.

    Do you have a plan like The Magic of Making Up?

    If so, use it, if not get one…OK?

    My advice, and the information here on my Blog will work hand in hand with The Magic of Making Up.

    Take Care,

    S. Williams

  25. Dear Scott,

    I took about a month before I pluck up the courage and called my ex boyfriend for some small talks, like finally! (although there are 3 instances where i’d dropped him a text msg on issues totally unrelated to the rs, but abt some work related qns). However, everything turned out into a heated argument towards the end of the conversation again! (the fact that we broke up because he felt that I was always arguing with him, putting my points across to him instead of listening and accepting it. To him, he felt that the rs was not going anywhere in the long run so in the end he chose to give it up.)

    During the conversation, he actually saw me through that i was still not ready to talk as friends, no matter how hard i tried to put up a strong facade, i failed again. So he wants me to take all my time until i feel i am ready to talk as friends again because he will always be ready to talk to me as friends. So at that moment, he felt I had stirred things up all over again.

    I had ruined all the chances of winning back his trust, the plan that I had strategically planned for a month. I ended up spoiling everything again. Because we have a few common friends, and one of them is his colleague I introduced into his office, so most of the time, they had small talks about the rs we had previously. Its impossible to make him feel he may missed my presence when my girl-friend would talk to him or vice versa; things about me in the office or on their journey back home. I had been reading your advices and followed the steps closely but now i’m so hopeless and clueless on what to do again. I dont know what to do to win back his love, I have no idea if he stills want me back or he totally wants it out.

    These emotional ups and downs is affecting me quite badly. As much as I want to believe in a leap of faith for the chance to reconcile, at times it seems that I am really at my wits and those hopes and strengths are slowly retreating away in me.

    Scott, I really need a direction to guide me on what I should do next. I felt so powerless in everything I did to make it right. I hope you can spare me some time to drop me a reply. Your advice will be sincerely appreciated.Thank you so much.

    Regards,
    Evon Chen

    1. so me and my boyfriend broke up about a year ago, it was a mixture of bad timing and it went downhill in a way we couldn’t control. We use to be so happy and he knows i was a good girl to him and he never treated me wrong but things just went for a flip when he lost someone close to him. His ex started reappearing (that screwed him over before me) and of course that caused more arguments so i left it alone, broke up with him and about a month later he started going out with her all over again even though everybody knew she did him wrong. I could tell he didn’t want to hurt me so he kept denying her and things going on with them.Since he did all that i cut all ties and i had to move on without any contact with him which i don’t regret because i know it caused him to miss me. I wasn’t going to chase after someone who already proved he moved on. I had got a new number and everything but recently (9 months later) i just caught myself thinking about him all over ALOT like dreaming of him and thinking of him a lot but i still did not try to contact him i was still just accepting us for what we were but like a night after i was telling my friend about my non stop thinking of him (she has no contact with him so he wouldn’t know anything) he was been trying to get my attention so bad on Facebook, liking all my pictures, liking post, and he never even did this when we first broke up. So i reached out to him just to see how he’s been because i could see he clearly has been thinking about me and the convo went good, we didn’t express no feelings or anything just had a small catching up convo and that their was no animosity between us two. He kept trying to keep the conversation going though but i wasn’t trying to get my hopes up in talking to him a lot so i just been trying to not pay him any mind while he’s still liking my post lol i don’t know what this means though but i would love your input!!

      1. Hi,

        This guy, your ex, sounds like a “rebounder”…rebounders like to bounce back and fourth between ex’s hoping to use left-over feelings to find an easy way back into your life, until, of course, it’s time to take off again.

        If you want to jump back into a relationship with someone who has already screwed you over by going back to his ex (because someone he knew died, a lame excuse, if there ever was one), then you are destined to learn about rebounders (players), the hard way.

        I suggest you use the no contact rule, this time around, and don’t fall for his facebook bullshit, that’s a chicken-shit way to weasel your way back into someone’s life, and probably what he used to get back with his old GF, before you broke up with him.

        Trust is a valuable commodity, and you can’t just waste it on untrustworthy people, (unless you like getting screwed over) it has to be earned, and he hasn’t earned it.

        You don’t really want him back as much as you want to stop feeling rejected. The sooner you start NC (the right way) the sooner you will stop feeling this way, but it will take time.

        I help people get over a break up and get their lives back, not get their ex back, and I explain why in the “About” section on my Blog.

        Make a commitment to yourself to stay in no contact for at least 12 months, and do not focus on getting your ex back – let your ex go.

        Your main focus is to break your dependency on your old relationship (and your ex) for happiness, and reestablish your life as a Happy Healthy single person.

        This is much more important than getting your ex back, and in 12 months you will realize what I’m saying is true.

        Go read the free plan to get your ex back and follow ALL the steps to get over a broken heart, evolve past the breakup, and get your life back again.

        Thank you for writing.

        Take Care,

        S.W.

        IMPORTANT – If you found this information helpful or useful, please give me a “+1” rating by using the colored “+1 button” at the bottom of the above article. I’d really appreciate it.

      2. I think that’s so sweet he’s tryin’ to get u back. But ask yourself if you think he needs to work harder than that.

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